Canada to Patagonia at a Worrying Age

This is probably going to be long and fairly boring if you’re not me. Sorry in advance, but I want to remember as much of the day as possible. It’s probably the most important day in Bolivia’s history since…

…and the square is filling with Aymara Indians, miners and the like. As suggested this is to be the people’s day. Evo has promised to end colonial government, reject neo-liberalism and continue the struggle of Che! Is this all too good to be true? Probably, and as one country Bolivia can hardly challenge the hegemony of the religious-capitalist right in the US. However, if the likes of Venezuela, Chile and the other states in this bloc can continue to espouse and enact progressive policies that the world so clearly needs maybe the experiences of the seventies and eighties can be overturned.

All Smile Or Don’t

Anyway, onto my experience. As suspected, there were ‘complications’ at the hotel, with woman I’m dealing with lying that the police own the hotel. At one point during the discussions she intimated that I was an American (and hence overly demanding). Had to put her right on that one.

Entirely predictably the TV networks have bagged the best rooms, no doubt paying significantly more than I’m prepared to. This means I have a room with a lesser view, but it’s still pretty good and it’s a mad, massive suite (plus 25% off for my trouble). Now to just sit back and see how the day goes. No sports channel, though, so the United – Liverpool game will have to take place without my participation.

I see I’m being watched by the police from a nearby rooftop. Just as well as there has been no security checks whatsoever. I could easily have been packing a rifle, and with full length net curtains could probably take aim at my leisure. If I had a gun, that is. Or knew how to fire one. Or wanted to kill anyone.

Marching band has arrived, signifying the start of something. Then an announcement of solidarity – yes that word was used – from the British Prime Minister. What? TV pictures show that Evo is still at house, wearing a fetching chompa.

It’s already getting very emotional. One of the reporters has already been in tears. I was very close when an Aymara woman was buying a flag in the square. Makes no sense, I know.

Kirchner has arrived at the airport, as have 8 other presidents – don’t think Bush is among them.

Noon – Outgoing president arrives to catcalls and whistles – kick off at Old Trafford. Posters of Che abound. More dignitaries arrive – this time to claps and cheers. The huge Bolivian flag that is in my room is unfurled and popped on the balcony. There is every chance I shall wave it.

1230 – Popular luminary arrives – no idea who he is. Possibly the Cuban envoy as the vocal crew with the blue and white flags start chanting ‘Cuba, Cuba!’ Apparently, Castro isn’t coming – gardening, decorating, what? Maradona’s meant to be here though. Believe when I see it. And I should see it. This view’s better than I thought – feel a bit bad now for having a go.

1240 – Chavez arrives – vocal support evident. TV indicates that Evo is still at home. Crowd will have to amuse themselves with lesser souls for a while yet. Although loads of Aymara women are now appearing. I read from his autobiography (7p from street vendor) that his parents were llama farmers. Of course they were

1245 – Kirchner arrives in square – not 25m from me. Gets mobbed by crowd. All this lot are walking to the event. Not a limousine in sight. Open the champagne.

1255 – Chavez arrives – crowd goes a bit wild, but not very. He didn’t go to meet them like Kirchner.

1300 – Outgoing Chilean president arrives. Loser. Evo still hasn’t left his casa.

1315 – everyone’s ready – the band have played a tune. Where’s Evo? He’s leaving the house! Without his chompa! He’ll catch his death. Nice jacket, though.

1320 – Evo arrives. Crowd didn’t quite realise. Smallish chant of Evo, Evo! Bit of a let down. Still – I saw him. Switch to telly now for swearing in. Perhaps it’ll be better when he comes out. He’ll be el presidente then.

1410 – Ceremony over, but outgoing president making a long speech. However, it appears as though United have beat the scousers. So that’s all good. According to my source (Angela), Ferdinand did something right for once and Gary’s in a bit of trouble. President Morales pardons you, Gary.

1415 – The chant goes up Evo, Evo! Come on Bolivia – time for a party…

Evo holds up his left fist clenched for the swearing in! Crowd goes mad.

Evo in tears – as am I. National Anthem – sung beautifully. Fantastic. How lucky I feel. Cannons fire around the city.

A minute’s silence for the martyrs. More tears.

1425 – Evo’s speech – talk of the indigenous people having enemies and something about South Africa. 500 years of something. We are continuing the struggle of Che. No robbery, no exploitation, no humiliation. This man is not messing about. And he’s got a fabulous centre parting. Corruption’s out the window. Congress listen uncertainly – get the bird from the crowd.

“The large entailed estate is unconstitutional.” Land reform as well!

“Neoliberalism is unemployment.” Go on my son. Can it get better?

1455 – Maybe he should think of winding up now – the crowd are looking a bit bored… Oh, hold on, they’re cheering again.

“There is international solidarity.” “We will change history with this parliament.” (It’s probably worth remembering that some of these translations may be approximate.)

1515 – still going. Odd ripple of applause at this stage. Come on Evo – you’re expected at Plaza San Francisco in a bit. Applause, cheers. Laughter.

“We are finished with slavery.” “We are finished with illiteracy.” Neither Fidel or Chavez have infected me!”

Headline on telly. “Evo has now been speaking for over an hour…”

He’s back on corruption now. We’re going to stamp on it in the streets and at customs, apparently. Big cheer.

1530 – It’s the soldiers standing to attention, I feel sorry for.

“We will resolve our historical problems with Chile.” That’ll take some doing.

If anyone’s still reading, well done. I think I’ll leave the speech for now and wait for some action, especially as there hasn’t been a cheer for quite some time…

1550 – Well done Evo. And out into the square we go to try to get pictures.

And here we have Evo and Hugo sharing a joke. Vice President looks on.

A hour of armed forces bands followed after which Evo went over to Plaza San Francico for the ‘fiesta’. I went along but after a bit decided to leave the party to make full use of my hotel room – ie the bath. Will rejoin the party later, in the meantime it’s on the telly, with the vice-pres saying pretty much the same things as his boss and at similar length…

Given La Paz’s topography song of the day is The Alabama 3’s Mansion on the Hill – Evo sure has the keys.

Evo gave another couple of small speeches before the end of play. As he spoke his final words, it rained (not a drop all day). Can he really control the weather as well?

Oh well, it’s been a great day and Bolivia is a great country. So I’m off to Chile in the morning.

NB The ads come on – it’s all European looking types. Bit of a way to go yet.

End of Day

Out for fiesta, food and fireworks. People still await further glimpses of Evo, but I feel like I know him quite well now. I’ll be boring people for years over his progress. Martha and Jose (the hotel ‘fixers’) finish my day by arranging, unbidden, my car to the airport Jose says next time he’ll set me up with many girls and Martha asks me to remember that God is always in my heart. So there we go.

Bit of a do nothing day today. Most of La Paz appears to have decamped to Tiwanaku for the ceremony. Slept in and then watched a bit of it on the telly. Funny, but better night’s sleep in this £3.50 a night hotel than the last. No towel, soap or toilet roll, mind, but they’re friendly enough. And the band’s last tune (in the concert hall next to my room) was over at 1.15am. So that’s all right then.

More rain and Hobson’s Choice over coffee shops (any sort of shops). So time to think of home and the tune becomes Rainy Night in Soho by Shane and the boys.

Finished the Boys from Brazil, so off to spot (by now, very old) Nazi’s in restaurants later. That’s if any are open (the restaurants, not the Nazis). Surely the staff will have made it back from Tiwanaku by tea-time. If not it’s grapes for tea and prepare to try to overcome the security in the square for my view tomorrow. Note no ‘we’ at the moment. Had a couple of politico buddies, but they’re taking everything rather too seriously. Plus, they’re in Tiwanaku with everybody else. Don’t feel that sociable at the moment. Maybe try being nicer to people tonight.

Later – went out for a bit of a walk to the posh part of La Paz. Usual contrasts between poverty and the rest. Well fed kids skateboarding and walking dogs. Parks, supermarkets, no horns blaring, plenty of bars and restaurants. Perhaps not Morales’ natural constituency.

Long walk back through the now busy streets and encountered the presidential motorcade, so hot-footed it over to the Plaza Murillo. Saw Chavez and the Colombian president (Uribe?), but then they rolled away the red carpet and with the rain falling once again, I headed home, noticing that the Gran Hotel Paris seems to have occupied its balconies in one way or another. Mmm… Let’s hope tomorrow is not to be a washout.

There is a certain amount of bunting and flags, but not a huge amount, perhaps in keeping with Morales’ humble image and approach. However, the people certainly seem to be enthusiastic – the optimism is tangible. (One huge banner at the local university compares Che, Chavez and Evo.) Mind you, we we’re all rather optimistic (with a level of cynicism) when we got rid of the Tories in ’97. Unfortunately, South America’s current wave of left-leaning governments could end up going the way of Europe’s move at the end of the last century, especially considering the World Bank’s evil influence over many fiscal matters. I only hope that the expectations of the people that their governments challenge the orthodoxy of the religious and economic right in their northern neighbours keep the leaders where they should be – beholden to the electorate, with the church taking no role in government affairs.

Let’s see.

Here endeth today’s lesson. Viva Morales…

On another note – I’m struck by how good The Stone Roses first album could have been if I Am The Resurrection was 3 minutes shorter. Luckily the next album on my notebook is The Streets – so the other track for tonight is Turn The Page.

This could all go wrong in so many ways.

However, it appears as though I have secured a suite overlooking the main square in La Paz for the day of the inauguration of the President. It’s costing me a couple of bob, but what the hell. If the people I have negotiated with today are true to their word I will have the best seat in the house. Just had to share that with you.

Could be another commentary one. Wonder if it’ll last the full ninety minutes. For non-football minded I’ll attempt to include some snippets of Bolivian life.

Sitting in room 218 of The Rosario Hotel on a cold and wet day (having dodged the tear gas in central La Paz) watching United attempting to overcome the mighty Burton Albion.

Ole is the captain. Mmm. Why not play a full-strength team? It’s not as though we have European ambitions. From here it sounds as though Burton are outsinging us in the Manchester rain.

3 Mins – Close shave already as their number nine gets a header in.

6 Mins – First real attack and Saha couldn’t miss. Hurray. But didn’t the Lille game start like this?

10 Mins – Corner to Burton. Did you know you can get dried llama foetuses from street markets here? You’re meant to bury them under the foundations of new buildings for luck. Do you think Arsenal have chucked half a dozen in the footings of the new Iraq Stadium?

14 Mins – Appalling through ball by O’Shea comes to nought.

18 Mins – Eat a plum. Quite nice, but slightly bitter near the stone. Rossi loses ball.

23 Mins – Young Rossi pops one in. As Nigel’s dad might have said –‘Well done young man’. Why couldn’t we do this in the first game?

32 Mins – I see their captain is called Darren Stride.

38 Mins – Free kick to Burton. If it’s an expensive new building you’re meant to put llama lambs in the foundations. They’re more expensive, but worth the extra. Do you think David Dein put his hands a bit deeper into his pockets for the Abu Dhabi stadium?

43 Mins – Throw in to United. By now, Ang and Paul will be drunk on gin, having left Alexander to fend for himself at home. Poor mite.

44 Mins – Saha through on goal. Doesn’t score. Someone put him out of his misery and sell him to Leeds.

Half Time. Think I’ll go and get a Bounty.

No chocolate for me. Picked up some puffed wheat from reception instead. Torrential downpour has slackened off to persistent rain.

47 Mins – Saha wastes another attack. I got my hair cut yesterday, you know. At one point it looked as though it was going to resemble that of Joe Brown in the early 70s. As it is it’s gone a little bit Steven Gerrard.

52 Mins – Left foot flyer from Richardson bursts the onion bag! Well done. Commentator very excited by that. I open a can of Pacena ‘centenario’ beer.

62 Mins – Treble substitution brings Neville onto the pitch. Gary Neville is a Red, you know. He hates Scousers. I believe were playing them this weekend. United now sleepwalking to ninety minutes.

65 Mins – Saha through on goal. Doesn’t score. Fergie’s reaction says it all.

68 Mins – Giggs shows Saha how it’s done. Lovely goal, deft touch from Rossi.

77 Mins – Saha controls ball and passes to own team-mate. Fair’s fair.

81 Mins – Gary ignores the open Saha to blast wide. Understand, Gary. This hotel’s costing £16 a night. Other travellers think I’m mad, although with free puffed wheat always on tap, I think I’ve made the right decision.

88 Mins – M56 must be busy by now, judging by the pictures. There’s a team in Bolivia called The Strongest, you know. Unfortunately, they’re not. Still, they’ve got a good kit. I tried to buy the shirt today. 43 quid! They can sod off.

90 Mins – Man of the match Rossi ends a fine performance with a superb blast from the edge of the box. Fergie proved right yet again.

Now bring on the mighty Wolves. Who’ve Leeds got in the next round again? I think it important that we continue to raise the issue of Arsenal having buried llama babies in the foundations of the Qatar stadium. Cruel Gooners!

Time for a quick snooze, I think, and then the continuing search for the decent South American pizza.

Night all.

PS – here´s that picture of the shoeshine boy

A quick word on the journey here. As you might expect, the bus from Copacabana was suitably blessed prior to the trip, but once out of the valley, we stopped to buy some gladioli as extra insurance. Good thinking, obviously, but I didn’t realise it was in order to prevent the sodding thing sinking. For it turned out we had to cross the lake (by the home of the Bolivian navy), by a boat that had seen many, many better days.

There is a sign at the crossing saying “Bolivia demands to the world a sovereign right from an exit to the sea.” Or as a local mag has “Long time, no sea.” This all relates to the War of the Pacific of 1879-84. I’ll bore you senseless on it sometime, if you want. In the meantime, write to your MP (I can’t).

Onto the scam. La Paz is a great city – sort of like Rome 20 years ago, and I’ve so far enjoyed my stay here. However today I met Paula from Ecuador who, like me, was looking for the Archaeological Museum. We set off together, only to be stopped by a gentleman asking if we spoke Spanish or English. Between us we spoke both, very useful when he produced his plain-clothes policeman identity card that I presume his 5-year-old grandson had put together. I was aware of this scam and told him where to go, pulling Paula away from him. The idea is that he is investigating counterfeit money and needs to examine your cash and your passport (keeping both until ‘later’).

Paula thanked me and went on her way, and it was only after she’d gone that I realised she was part of it. If I hadn’t reacted so quickly she would have produced her documents and money first (as a ‘foreigner’), with me expected to follow. Little minx!

Anyway, I still haven’t met the president, although I know his back in the city. But I have met one of the shoeshine boys who hide their faces (supposedly out of shame) while they earn money for their education. This picture cost me 2 Bolivianos (I didn’t need my shoes shining today). Picture won’t load – will try another day.

In case I don’t post tomorrow – Happy 50th Paul! You don’t look a day over 45.

PS – Correct Flickr link – http://www.flickr.com/photos/28108075@N00/

Leeds 3 Wigan 3 (aet) Wigan win 4-2 on penalties

PS Chester fans should not have relied on Tigger.

Copacabana is sacred amongst Bolivian Catholics as a place where (I think) thr Virgin Mary is meant to have appeared – the Knock of Bolivia. As such loads of pilgrims arrive everyday to get their stocks of holy water and puffed wheat sorted out and leave on one of the many arranged buses around 6pm back to La Paz. However, if you have a car you need to get it blessed and here’s how.

Queue up with all the other cars, lorries and buses that need a blessing. While doing so decorate your vehicle with ribbons, garlands and petals. When it’s your turn lift the bonnet and let the attendant priest spinkle holy water on your engine (see picture below). Throw petals over him and each other and then let off some firecrackers. Throw some more petals and then pour beer (available for purchase just outside the cathedral gates) over each of the wheels. Now your car is blessed and you can carry on regardless, knowing that no matter how appalling your driving may be you will be safe.

In order to make doubly sure have a brass band knock out a tune. Brass bands are everywhere in the Andes, and there’s nothing hey like more than a feast day (every day’s a feast day) in order to get out the old instruments and parp around the main square or high street, preferably with children dressed uo for the occasion and some women with hats on throwing petals at some religious icon or other. It’s the Andean way. In the illustration below, the date was the 2nd January and you will see the important presence of Tigger, not previously thought to have been a key figure in the revised versions of the gospels.

On another note, Bolivian restaurant service deserves a mention. I had thought that Peru held the honours when it came to slow and yet chaotic service, but so far Bolivia is the winner. Last night a family of five managed to arrive after me, order, eat and pay before my (delicious) dinner even got to me. Today, I got my own menu after waiting twenty minutes and being offered at least three other people’s lunch. The main problem appears to be the boys they employ as waiters. I think the selection criteria is ‘You are my son. Get to work.’ The training arrangements seem to be the same. It’s all good for that.

Also, I’ve probably given a slightly worn out impression in recent days – a mixture of bothersome illness and rain. Well, I’m feeling much better today and write this as I lie in my hammock in bright sunshine overlooking the bay, eating an ice cream and listening to a Café del Mar album – the brass bands and firecrackers going off in the distance. If I could guarantee the sunshine, I’d stay longer, but it’s still La Paz tomorrow if I can get the right bus. Below is the view from my hammock.

More pictures from the journey in general are available at the Flickr website – not sure of the link, but if you search jmp_abroad at Flickr.com you should find them.

Revised tune for yesterday – Don’t Need The Sunshine, Catatonia. Recently finished book – The Little Friend, Donna Tartt. Could be a very scary film in the hands of the right director…

Hot News – another ´centre left´president for South America – in Chile this time. And I´m going there next. Raise a glass to Michelle Bachelet.

And when it rains here, it really, really, really, really rains. It’s either a super deluge of biblical proportions or Manchester-constant drizzle, cold and persistent. Of course when the sun’s shining it’s gorgeous – it’s just it doesn’t shine very often. Also, the altitude is still having an effect, meaning it’s time to move on again. I won’t be dropping much in altitude, but at least if it rains, there will be more things to do in La Paz.

I’m actually still rather poorly so I’ve a feeling I’m going for posh hotel for a couple of days – which always makes it harder to downgrade when the time comes. Still, get a move on and all that. The vicarious thrills being had at George’s expense are keeping my pecker up. Rula Lenska, indeed – couldn’t they get Googie Withers? Actually, I always fancied Rula when she was in Rock Follies – what a great programme that was and deserves repeating (bet it would be rubbish now).

In the meantime, chuffed to discover it is Saturday, so onto the footie results. Disaster. Not happy at any single one. Then Crewe lose 5-1 and Chester lose at home. Still, Karly, Paulie and Shauny are happy, I suppose. And at least Leeds lost and Celtic won. If you´re reading this, by the way, John K, I cannot find SPL games anywhere at the moment. I´ll try an Irish bar in a big city. Santiago looks favourite at the moment…

Thanks for the comments everyone. I think you´ll find I was far and away the first Paz, sister. If you go the Billet now, you have to ask some pretty strange people for proof. And anyway, I was a barman there in case you´ve forgotten.

Hi Audrey, lovely to hear from you…

And here´s a picture to keep Johnnyboy happy.

Scene is the highest point of the climb over the Altiplano where we stopped to buy stuff of these lovely people.

Today´s counterintuitive song is I Wish It Would Rain by Wreckless Eric

After the hectic lifestyle of Peru, I’m now in Bolivia having a well-earned rest. I’m 8km over the border in Copacabana on the shores of Lake Titicaca – a place guaranteed to induce giggles when I was a mature schoolboy. I’m still at altitude (3800m) but somehow it seems easier to cope with here. Maybe it’s simply acclimatisation. I’m in a hotel with a room overlooking the town and the lake and for £8 a night it’s the best value place I’ve found so far (La Cupula, if anyone’s interested). One of its many fantastic attractions is the use of a kitchen, meaning I cooked last night. An event of such overwhelming simplicity and joy that I can’t begin to convey. Just buying the ingredients (essentially they were free) and combining them into something I knew I would like is just a huge change from the slight hit-or-miss nature of constantly eating in restaurants. Not that it’s too bad doing that. I had a perfectly nice three-course meal for lunch today for less than two quid.

The lake is stunning when the sun comes out (it’s raining at the moment) and I plan to get out on to it when I can be bothered. For the minute I’m happy enjoying where I am and girding my loins for de facto capital in about a week. La Paz, by the way, stirs another schoolboy memory. Along with many people of my surname, Paz was my nickname at school and it was one of those places in geography books that I thought I must go to one day. And here we nearly are…

Sorry nothing more exciting to report. There is the ubiquitous presence of hippies, but I’m even cool about that here. The rains going off, so I’m off out,

Yours,

A resting traveller.

The next day

Er, it´s still raining. Hard. Perhaps this isn´t quite the Shangri La it appeared to be at first.

Had a long rambling post prepared, but it really needs a good edit, so here´s a quick update.

Machu Picchu involved the usual 5am start – a minimum requirement in South America. Tomorrow I´m up at 6 to go to Bolivia, so that´s a lie-in.

Train to MP amazing etc etc. Town of Aguas Calientes great. Chuffed to get a place with bathroom for a fiver a night. Only later did it become clear it was the railway station (they have two in a town of 1000 souls). You could say it was noisy.

Machu Picchu phenomenal, as you might expect. Up at 0630 to visit it. Cloudy first hour, then hot sun at 2500m. All glorious (the site, the eagles, the llama fight) apart from sunstroke and nasty insect bite. Neither too serious. Peruvian doctor was determined to give me an injection. I was against this idea. Turns out the anti-inflammatory cream was all that was needed, although my nose remains a shining beacon to the world.

Couple more days in Cusco – sort of recovering. Now in Puno after most fantastic railway journey in world. Original post wondered how many more experiences in one trip I could manage. Keep trying I suppose. Hope to get two weeks in one place in the nearish future – perhaps on the coast of Chile. However, I want to get involved with President Morales inauguration first, if that´s possible. Any tips scoured from the internet or elsewhere much appreciated (just discovered 22 Jan – couldn´t be better, but still need advice on parties, street demos etc.).

[Just found this – sounds like the one… “Additionally, there will be another, but this time more symbolic, ceremony. This ceremony will take place on the 21 of January and it will be in the town of Tiwanaku, El Altiplano. It will be here where Morales will be taking “real power”. He will be invested with a traditional altiplanic authority poncho (the highest there is), the authority staff and the whip. The whip is a symbol of punishment to those who do not behave in a communal way and disrupt the order. In other words, it seems he’ll be made king of the altiplano indians. It sure seems that way.”] I have an authority whip myself from my recent deification, you know.

Final note to the many contributors. I really appreciate your input. Thank you and keep up the good (although occasionally insulting) work. To those who visit (I can see you looking) and say nought – please join in. If my MP wants to leave a note when he gets evicted, so much the better. This is the way to connect with the interweb generation, George!