Toma Tu Teta
Thursday, December 28th, 2006If anyone besides my father has been following our route on a map, they will be surprised to learn that we´re now in León, Nicaragua. It seems like only two days ago that we were two countries away in Guatemala. It seems this way because it´s true. We arrived in León last night after two full days of bus, boat, truck, and colectivo-ing our way through Honduras — which we skipped altogether. And here we are.
Though we had planned to summarize our experience in Guatemala into a neat top ten list of some sort, we realize that our time there was unsummarizable. Well, that and the fact that we´ve already written about all our most interesting Guatemalan experiences. (Except for this: Ricardo Arjona, Guatemala´s favorite son, has a new hit single entitled “Ayúdame Freud” (“Help Me Freud”) — it is a song about his mother.)
Time to move on.
Today we went to the Museum of Legends and Traditions in León. Museums are a great way to re-introduce yourself to travel, since they offer a nice, encapsulated slice of knowledge about a new place and almost immediately make you feel more connected.
Nothing could have made us feel more connected to León than the fable of the “Toma Tu Teta” woman. Loosely translated, this means, “Take Your Tit.” Once upon a time in León there lived a woman who had the large arms of a man and gigantic breasts. (This was illustrated in the museum by a life-sized woman wearing a black dress and exposing her right breast. She and her giant breast were made of paper mache.) Being formed in this way made her unmarriagable, a fact that drove her to insanity. Her insanity manifested itself in nocturnal ramblings through the streets of León in search of nice-looking men. Making use of her surprising stature (the very stature that made her life so difficult), she would catch these men, throw them to the ground, and shout “¡Toma tu teta!” while forcing her victim to suckle her massive boobage. When she was “satisfied” she would let the man up and go in search of new prey.
How weird is that?
Well, now we know. Thank you León.
-Both of Us. Equally.
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