Taken for granted…
Sunday, October 26th, 2008Rob musing this time…..
It is one of those unfathomable quirks of human nature that we find it so easy to lose sight of the big picture and get tangled up with the minutiae of a situation. Why is it just so easy to take things for granted, and so quickly to lose appreciation of reality?? Especially in those times when you know there really ARE bigger things going on, so you wonder HOW on earth you could get wound up by small irksome events. Try, for example, being three weeks into a world trip with your family … and finding yourself having to grill some older children for the umpteenth time about speaking to another sibling in a voice that is disrespectful, or for fighting, or for.. well, you name it! And there is that sudden flash of thought, “Man, I wish we were back home”. Then you stop and think about what has just gone through your mind and you realise *whoa! it is time to get things back in perspective*
Not just the perspective of all the ideals that this trip was meant to be about for our children – about opening these young eyes to the wider world and some of its needs, about experiencing a different type of life than what we had in NZ, about hopefully allowing seeds to be planted in these little lives that might direct their future life-choices. Yes, these perspectives are important, but also how about considering the perspective offered from the simple fact that we can CHOOSE to take a trip like this, which sets us apart from 99% of the people we are rubbing shoulders with on those crowded trains, the locals next to us standing in line for LRT tickets….compared to the rest of the world, we are rich. Not just in the family sense, but in cold hard cash terms. I know this privilege carries with it responsibility, but I found myself momentarily stuck on my inconvenience.
How do you maintain the bigger picture when those everyday events such as disciplining your kids seem to grate so much? Maybe it is about constantly reminding myself that this trip is not so much about ME and what I am going to get out of it, but more about what I am going to possibly help others get out of it. After all, the children have just had their complete worlds turned upside down – they are in completely new countries, eating completely different food at strange times, meeting completely new people (even if they ARE related 🙂 ), it’s incredibly hot, nothing is familiar, regular bedtime is a distant memory and they are constantly thirsty… so maybe it is no wonder they are feeling and reacting slightly out-of-sorts! Maybe I need to remind myself that this IS an opportunity of a lifetime, and one that I should embrace with open (and patient) arms. And if I keep doing this, hopefully we will be able to walk through this trip as a united family, to grow together through the shared experiences (good and bad), and to keep our eyes on the bigger lessons that this classroom of life has to teach us all as we journey. That is my goal, my prayer for the next few months. God-willing, it will be our experience too!
Rach adds: we had been warned by some who have gone before that the hardest part of extended travel like this is the 24/7 contact. Obviously we are only just beginning, but I suspect this is the time Rob will find it most difficult. I’m used to having the kids around all day every day (although even for us it is different – they can’t escape outside to climb trees and ride bikes for hours each day, and they don’t have books to snuggle up with for *down time* each afternoon. But we knew about that when we started, and we decided to proceed all the same.) For Rob, it’s VERY different. He usually walks out the door as we are having breakfast and reappears in time for dinner. The kids perk up when he walks in the door and he can sometimes wonder if the events I recall from the day could possibly have happened! He’s seeing now, it’s all true 😉 In case you should think I’m saying his job is not demanding or challenging or difficult or trying, I’m not! It’s both-and. Both jobs have their ups and downs. And right now we are negotiating how best to guide our children along this new path. Soon we’ll find our groove of working together…..and a burden shared is a burden halved.
Update on a previous post:
if you want to see pictures of the girls’ tattoos, click right here 😉
Oh, and nearly forgot….happy birthday to L8.
rayres