But, I am defnitely getting used to it. It seems to happen all the time. As I mentioned earlier, we were taking a tour of the Royal Palace.

So, we took the tour on Tuesday. I was wrong about a few things. First, it actually has 2800 rooms, not the measley 1500 that I previously thought. 2800 rooms? That seem like an overkill to anyone else? How many mistresses can a King have? Imagine trying to keep the Prince from sneaking out to all the crazy parties when he was like 15. Had to be impossible. He could have had girls all over the place like a Little John video or something.

On the bright side, I got to see the silverware and china patterns from many a different king, queen and princess. THAT was exhilirating. I think I almost orgasmed when I saw King Ferdinand´s soup bowls. Ahh, who am I kidding, I definitely did but tried to play off my spasms as a pulled muscle.

As for positives, the paintings were amazing. All the ceilings were vaulted and domed, with insane paintings on them. The most impressive part of all of it to me is how an artist can paint something so big and intricate all while hanging from the ceiling. My arm gets tired after about 15 minutes of reading on my back and holding the book up in front of me. Granted, I´m a baby, but still some of those paintings took years. That´s some serious dedication.

Lest you think all I do is complain, let´s talk about the Thyssen Museum. It´s the best museum I have ever been to. Loads of great work. Mostly impressionism and for some reason, it seemed like almost everyone in the North American collection was from Jersey. I´m just saying, we got a bad rap but that´s mostly due to 80´s hairstyles, The South, and that damn stretch of the turnpike near Newark Airport (rumor has it that road is a lock to be named "ugliest area known to man" for the third year in a row). Besides all of Jersey´s finest, saw quite a number of Monet´s, Manet´s, Rembrandt´s and others. If you are ever here, make sure to visit.

As for Erika being here, I promised her that I wouldn´t make fun of her or tease her on the blog. She´s in the air right now on her way home and I´m immature. Sorry Erika. On her first day here she asked me about American cars. I told her that I didn´t really see many at all. So, like Dustin Hoffman counting toothpicks, she starts counting all the Fords we saw. All I hear is "there´s one...there´s another one" or "15 and 16 right there". I actually thought I heard her say something about "244 fords" and "definitely time for Wopner." When I thought I heard her talking about underwear from K-Mart I realized that I might be going a little insane. After about 20, her conclusion was that I was crazy and wrong and she was right. So, when she returns to NY she promised to research it and find out how much money Ford makes in Spain. Considering gas can be anywhere from $5.25 - $6.00 a gallon here, there isn´t much demand for those cute little environment-killers like the Excursion or Expedition.

As for the rest of our week, let´s have a quick recap:

1) Royal Palace Tour

2) Thyssen Museum

3) The Palace Gardens

4) Plaza Mayor and Sol

5) We saw a young couple about to "hump" on the grass until the security told them that they couldn´t be on the grass. I don´t think he said anything about humping because of the abundance of PDA´s here.

6) She got a picture of one of my friend´s boobs in a bar on Friday night. Trust me, you don´t want that picture. He didn´t have an impressive rack. Though one day I might post it up here.

7) I think we logged about 978 hours in cafe´s and restaurants.

Oh, and I took some more pictures. Trust me, they are good. Maybe one day I will stop being so lazy and actually put them on this damn page.