Caught by the fuzz
Well, the door police actually. Massive skinhead Eastern European bouncer at the Melbourne Library doors wouldn’t let me in because of ‘bag size.’ I got a bit fresh, he told me where I could go. I did manage to sneak through in the end though…
Reminds me a little of the time when I was a drunkard and a fool in Liverpool and I once threatened a bouncer with the most bone chilling of all threats. Nearby was Kensington, the poorest town in England and therefore full of right ‘ard types itching to go bouncer bashing, (not that I knew any of them but the bouncer didn’t know that.) Also, there had recently been a spate of attacks in clubs with weapons, see above for who was likely to be responsible. So that was two options right there that I could have doled out in an attempt to weaken the scouse bouncer’s resolve, instead, I threatened him with… the council. Oh yes, my local M.P. was going to hear of this. I cannot explain for the life of me why I would consider that to be a threat, unless of course, David Cameron was the M.P. for Allerton, Liverpool. Little to do with Melbourne maybe, but still, the vibe of the whole ‘bag size’ -gate incident was highly reminiscent of my student years.
Thursday means it’s nearly Friday, woop woop! There’s a computer games expo that I’m semi tempted to drag Lauren along to, although, I’m not sure if it will weigh up worthwhile against all of the foot massages and episodes of Home and Away that I shall be forced to endure as payment. There’s also the Christmas Parade in the CBD on Saturday, might be nice to see some poor fatty dressed as Santa being made to waddle up and down Melbourne town center in 31 degree heat.
My view of Melbourne is going up, although only slightly, now that I have some disposable cash from work. I still feel like I’m in place where the only really foreign bit is in Chinatown when they put Chinese writing under the English writing on menus, but I’m trying, I really am. At least Lauren and I have both landed well on our feet for work and accommodation, so we can at least save plenty of $$$ here for muchos spending down the East coast in the new year.
My gnarled builder’s hands are growing furthermore impervious to pain, today I acquired another 2 cuts and only noticed now because I’m typing. Grrr!
Tags: Australia, Melbourne, Travel
mikeloken
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