The Little Kiwi That Could (Fly)
And so it was that the little kiwi who could, did what no kiwi in the history of kiwi evolution has ever done, and flew 25 1/2 hours (plus 6 hours stopover) with no sleep surviving with most of her sanity intact. Details as follows (with headings for your convienience):
SAFETY STATUS: I AM OKAY, I REPEAT I AM OKAY.
Please bear in mind as I regail you with my travels so far that I have barely slept for over 30 hours…..
FLIGHTS.
I left Auckland at 2.10pm after a not-too-tearful goodbye (but thanks Mum for setting me off) on a Maylasian airlineflight to Kualar Lumpur.
Details of flight as follows:
Duration: approx 10 hours
Seat: In the middle, no aisle – could it be any worse?
Neighbours: Was sat next to a nice French Geography Masters student (who coincidentally also had dreads – or was it coincidence? maybe part of new security measures to keep all the dreadheads together, where they can be easily kept under surveilence). Like I said, he was nice except he kept sneezing so Im hoping I havent caught some French bird flu or anything.
Food: Argh spicy! I had a lovely nutritious meal of white rice and gloopy jello thing – everything else had enough chilli to fry my brains.
Toilets: Gross – should have gone sooner. And that flushing noise is the scariest sound in the world.
Entertainment: Yay! Little TVs! Though the novelty did wear off after watching the episode of friends where Phoebe tries to teach Joey french 5 times and the jail scene in Bridget Jones 2 just as many times.
Loss of sanity rating: 21%
Flight 2 – KLM to Amsterdam
Time: 12 1/2 hours
Seat: In the middle, no aisle, just behind the row with all the legroom as if to taunt me and yes it could be worse (see neighbours)
Neighbours: Two men who proceeded to slowly spread themselves further across both their own seats and mine. I could have held my ground I guess but I didnt want to seem to friendly as the Indian man to the left of me (complete with gold chains and tweed jacket) had already offered me his card and invited me to visit Scotland – “no problem, no problem” apparently. So I sit there for 12 1/2hours unable to move sandwiched between two spreadeagled chairhogs and I begin to question what the hell I’m doing there, how will I last the trip without getting DVT and more importantly, how does one make ones way to the toilet when ones access to the aisle is obstructed by a snoring spreadeagled fat man. Well, apparently one holds on as long as possible then politely taps him on the shoulder and asks to get by.
Food:First meal was edible – eggplant lasagne?. Second meal was noodles – with real chilli pieces of course, and a gloopy jello thing.
Entertainment: no personal tv screens but tv upfront showing Neverland – only thing stopping me from going WWF with my dinner tray on sleeping (and snoring) spreadeagled fat man. Tip: if your seat neighbour wont stop talking to you keep your headphones on at all times. – They should put that in the inflight safety video.
Toilets: still gross and scary.
Loss of sanity rating: 97% Aaaarrrgghhhh
Last flight Amsterdam to Dublin
Only an hour 10 minutes thank God. And Dublin airport is very easy to find your way out of and doesnt have toilets that flush while you’re still on them which is always a bonus in my eyes.
THE LAND OF THE IRISH
And so it was that I found myself in the Land of the Irish. And as I stepped outside the airport I stopped for a moment to pay homage to my mother the wise one,with her girlguide instinct, for supplying me with winter woollies to keep me warm despite much rolling of eyes and other mother mocking behaviour from her silly silly daughter. Four degrees.
I proceeded to find a bus to the city and was soon told off by an elderly Irish lady for not putting my pack in the luggage holder, so I apologized, how could I not, she was just so cute with her liitle angry Irish accent. Another little cute Irish accented man showed me where to get off and I found the hostel who told me I couldnt go to my room til 3pm – apparently it takes 5 hours to make the beds. So I wandered the streets for a while,had a hideous breakfast of scrambledeggs, tomato and mushroom – all obviously microwaved to death – its like I never left the plane but everyone around me seemed to be enjoying it – crazy Irish people.
I got a map from the hostel and its got green bits on it which I stupidly assumed were parks or grass where I might sit for a bit and just hang out. But there are no parks in Dublin. There is grass but its got big fences around it. I think its endangered. I decide to walk to the Liffey – the river that runs through Dublin – thinking maybe I’ll find a little haven of nature to cleanse my soul. And isnt it lovely – a lovely shade of mildew green. And there are seats lining it so people can sit and admire just how lovely a shade of mildew green it is.
I kept wandering and ended up here writing for you with a hazy brain.
I like Dublin so far – despite its lack of naturally occuring grass. Its got a nice feeling about it. And eveyones got cute happy Irish accents. Awww.
And there are seagulls with bodies just like the grey gulls in NZ but their faces are black – like they’ve got little zorro masks on. And most of the streets are one way so I can jaywalk like a real Dubliner and no-one will know Im an imposter if I dont keep taking my map out.
And now I think I will go sleep,or at least shower. Tommorow – if I wake up in time for tomorrow, I’ll seek out the art sites, maybe search for some nice green grass to frolick in a little farther afield….
Tags: Dublin
Em