Attention, the boat has reached the shore….
or has it or did I just dive into the river because I didn’t need that particular boat, or did I cross the shore a million times and I left the boat behind?
I sometimes read this woman’s blog, Solbeam to see what she’s up to and what new insights she has…
this woman is scary sometimes, here’s the question I was asking myself last week and continue to, in regards to the attachment of working on myself through and with the ex…….and maybe I haven’t reached the shore yet, and maybe I jumped off the boat into the river to swim by my damn self hoping that another boat will come along and I can climb in and let that take me some where else, and get close to a shore before i want to jump in the river again to see if I can’t just swim to the damn shore my self.
In the meantimes I created signs that remind me of him of late, and feeling his energy at certain times of the day, and it seems that I have enough detachment to see that I can attach whatever meanings I can to those things, like oh maybe I should call him to end it in a more loving, less abrupt manner. But I don’t. I keep sending love being love, and feeling where I feel stuck, which isn’t in that many places anymore.
I tell you I don’t know Kedar-ji did, but man he shifted some things…fo sho!
I still have yet to write about my bhai, my Guru-little brother…..
Tags: boats, break up, buddhism, men, parable, signs, The Path of Life
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