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Monkey attacks

phi phi

My bungalow was right at the back next to the forest/jungle, which is, as I found out later, inhabited by monkeys.

One day, I was sitting in my bed reading a book when I heard some steps right outside, so I think – ‘Andrew must be coming back’ – when I look up , I see a monkey walk in the door. This isn’t any cute little thing either. Its a large male monkey staring at me. So, I sit up to scare it away and it just looks at me and growls! bearing its teeth! I’m thinking ‘holy shit, I’m going to get attacked by a monkey.” It stops its growling and runs up to the table in the room and steals a bag of mangos. I’m still in shock from the fact that a monkey just ambushed me, but I’m still thinking ‘hey, I walked all the way to town for those mangos.’ So, I grab a broom and go to retrieve, but the damn monkey had already tore into both mangos and was calmly eating them right there at the bottom of my stairs, as if to spite me. The two females came out, 1 with a small baby clutching to her, so I threw them a banana, which the bastard male tried to steal. The picture below is the female with the baby peeking in the room.

monkey

So, that was my first run-in with the monkeys. The second time might have been worse. I was making a b-line to the bungalow at top speed, for a stage-3 emergency had suddenly set upon me and I had dire need to drop a dirty, dirty, deuce. So, I am almost at my place, looking upon the steps, when I see the monkey under the stairs. In my haste I think nothing of it and proceed.

The monkey does his little sideways aggressive monkey shuffle and bars my way. I’m thinking ‘theres no way this monkey is going to block me out of my own house, and certainly not at this particular junction in time…’ So, I proceed.

As soon as I take a step forward, he extends one arm to the ground in front of him and crouches all the way down, cat-like, in some sort of monkey attack pose. Again, I’m thinking ‘Holy shit! I’m going to get attacked by a monkey.’

So, I retreat and gathered a few bottles, which I then used as projectiles to scare the foul beast away.

Anyway, on another note, I ended up staying on Ko Phi Phi for about 12-14 days, something like that, with a grand total for accomodation being $75 U.S. dollars. Don’t listen to guidebooks. If you want to go somewhere, just go, you’ll find something. ‘No Cheap accomodation on Phi Phi’ is all we heard before we arrived. The only thing from the guidebooks that is true about Ko Phi Phi is one statement in the Lonely Planet that says ‘Ko Phi Phi is so beautiful, it’ll make you cry.’

On yet another note, there are now signs for tsunami evacuation routes on the island. Some of these point you absolutly nowhere, and I saw some being used to advertise bar specials… If the water suddenly gets sucked out to the sea, head for the hills, thats about all I know.

tsunami escape

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2 Responses to “Monkey attacks”

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  2. Posted from United States United States
  3. Ian Says:

    I noticed that the evacuation routes end in a dead end too – this is more dangerous than not having evacuation routes as everyone would end up at the same bit of precipitous jungle. If there was a tsunami this would be the last place to go – just head for the hills any other way you can. I think it is scandalous that money, possibly from the distaster fund, has been spent in this way.

  4. Posted from Australia Australia

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