Pain and Suffering in the Mountains of Central China
I just finished reading “The Travels of Marco Polo”, which seemed intriguing enough as a choice of literature during my first stint in mainland China. I was surprised to find that it reads very differently than expected. Rather than offer a narrative of his experiences, or even personal insight, he merely presented a series of objective elements to log the attributes of various cities visited during his journey through the medieval Far East. It was interesting enough, but constantly seemed as though something vital was missing.
Reading the afterword by Howard Mittlemark helped to clarify Polo’s potential motives as not simply being limited by medieval thinking and literature, but rather the product of a unique experience chronicling new territory. He then proceeded to compare the style to modern travel writing by saying that now “no matter where you go, somebody has been there before, and the only thing left to chronicle is the infinite minute variations of the inner world.”
So what is going on in my ‘inner world’ right now? Would you really like to hear about my current state of depression? Do you really care, or are you a hoping to justify your comfort zone by thriving on the knowledge of my current tales of misfortune? Either way, here it comes… currently, I am completely miserable. For the first time since I set out on this adventure (and for a long time before that) I am far from happy to be where I am. My positive outlook has taken a vacation and left me alone with a demon called pessimism.
I’m still anxiously awaiting my replacement bank card to arrive and take the place of the one lost in Beijing. It should have shown up a couple weeks ago, but apparently UPS express shipping means that my urgent delivery will completely pass it’s destination by over 600km and decide to spend over four days hanging out in Beijing while I’m stranded with no money; last time I checked, it’s still there now.
I wouldn’t even mind this long of a delay if I was stuck somewhere that I didn’t absolutely loathe. The Chinese military boarding school where I intended on learning kung-fu has completely taxed my system and pushed me to my breaking point.
Bland, repetitious cafeteria food has left me with a consistent pattern of diarrhea for the last two weeks of intense martial arts training. I am suffering from an infected cut on my foot, revisiting sharp lower back pain from a previous accident and cringing in pain at every movement that slightly affects my pulled groin muscle. I’m limited on everything I can do, and I watch as my limited ability to train slips further and further away from anything remotely resembling kung-fu. Yet it doesn’t stop… everyday pushing past the limits of what my body can handle.
The already prison-like atmosphere has been compounded by a recent viral outbreak in the nearby town that has forced the school onto lockdown. We are no longer able to look forward to our brief weekly sojourn from grueling physical pain, cold showers, the unhygienic campus and its insipid selection of food. Top that all of with a creeping head cold and the daily routine of dodging unwarranted spitting and accumulating garbage piles, and you may see why I feel the way I do. My mind is breaking down as fast as my body, and each day stretches into a weeks worth of utter despair.
If it weren’t for the motley assortment of foreign students who are all suffering the same fate and the masochists who absolutely love every minute of it, my will and spirit would have been broken too. I have met some great people here and had the chance to meet with fellow BootsnAll bloggers Amanda and Greg. Yet, I still don’t think I ever wanted to leave a place as bad as I do now.
Alas, I’m trapped here as my bank card slowly inches its way across China at a snails pace. I desperately crave freedom… to have a good meal when I choose, accompany it with a frosty cold beer, relax in a hot shower, sleep past dawn and wake without a body full of pain and sore muscles.
So there it is; my current ‘inner world’. For you sadists out there, I’m sure you are overjoyed. For all of those who truly care, please don’t be too concerned about my current fate. I know that soon enough it will all be over and I will be back into tales of adventure and intrigue. I still have big plans, high hopes and will not let this experience cloud my future.
Ironically, this entry fills the last page of my journal, so the next time I write will be of a fresh mind in a book of blank pages…. once again liberated from the shackles that bind and full of appreciation for the world of good fortune that lies ahead.
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Tags: - Reflection, Asia, China, Chinese Kung Fu, Henan, Pain
Adam Shane
Seems like it was quite a bad timing if you ever read my previous comment put up a couple of days ago as I said there I was happy for you doing well out there.
I’m truly and sincerely sorry to hear that you’ve been having a hard time but as you said, I also believe you will get over very soon and will be full of energy and excitement as ever.
Months before your arrival at the Kung Fu school, I intuited that you would have an eye-opening experience to jar you from the fantasy and mythical nature that might have been anticipated prompted by Hollywood movies or whatever…and some naivete of the grueling workout you would be subjected to. Hoping they have the proper medical care for your infected foot and be mindful of dehydration with the diarrhea.
Dude, if I have to eat eggs and tomato one more time I am going to take a Kwan Dao and lop off the heads of all the cooks!!!!!
Whoa…what a change. Sounds a lot like life in Marina del Rey.
Mentally & physically hang in there and leave as soon as you can.
We love you….
Great to hear that you’are now in much better condition and hope today’s short trip to the temple is refreshing you more!
I’m doing good but the weather here is not as good as me:) Typhoon named the 9th (Don’t know when the 1st to 8th passed us by???) is on the way..it’s really coming right now…a lot of schools in Tokyo are off tomorrow except for my school…I’ll have to get through the pouring rain and wild wind only to get to the school….is it really that worthwhile? I wonder…
Anyhow, keep up being well and don’t forget to smile. I love your smile as it makes you sugoku kawaii !!!:)
“Without the bitter, the sweet isn’t as sweet.”
I know there’s a lot of bitter right now, but there’s a ridiculous amount of sweet in your future. Just a few more days. The feeling of swinging that backpack on your back and walking out of the school with no note and knowing you never have to do a bridge or eat fried tomatos and eggs again is just about as sweet as it gets.
I’ve been trying to email you the past few days, but it keeps getting bounced back?
I heard you got your card and I’m so glad you’ll be out of there soon. I think I’m still a little traumatized. Dicos is in Lhasa and everytime I see one I feel like I have to be back for 4:00 training.
Good luck, Adam!!
Yes, Adam…ditto on the bounceback e-mails. I tried e-mailing you twice today and both were bounced back. If you can get through to us by sending out e-mail, send us your next target destination and any possible phone or addresses of where you might be staying. Don’t forget, Tibet was invaded by China, so your Internet access may still likely be blocked there also.
Mom
hang in there bro and i guess disregard my last comment. our hearts are with you and im sure great things are coming very soon.
this will all be a “funny story” over beers at some point in our future. dont lose sight of that!!!!!!!
Does anyone know what has happened with Adam? Is he still in China?
Sept 18th
Thanks