The Misadventures of Joey Tafuro

There are many times while traveling that you feel as though all you are doing is taking from the communities that you visit. So much tourism and there seems to be a sense of lost tradition and culture. Sometimes it is important that you give back to the people who treat you so well while traveling.

Earlier this afternoon while going to pick up my laundry from a nice old lady on the street side I came across a group of 3 Lao boys trying to make fart noises with their limbs. 2 of them were waving their feet in the air while cupping the back of their knees and the other was doing the traditional arm pit motion. None of them were able to make any sort of noise come out. I decided it is time to sit down and really interact with the locals. I showed the 2 boys trying the leg farts that they need to lean back on their butts a little bit to get more leverage and that the faster you move your legs the more likely you are to produce a fart noise. I had both of them doing it right in no time. After that I moved on to the easier armpit fart and showed them a series of loud obnoxious noises. This entire time there were 2 adults across the street laughing at the situation.

In the end I left all 3 boys with the ability to make fart noises as much as they want.

Mission accomplished.

On another note. Happy Cinco De Mayo. I hope everyone is partaking in one of my favorite holidays. Unfortunately, I don’t have any Mexican food in Luang Prabang but I have found a nice happy hour spot that has tequila so I will be joining the older American couple I met on the boat for some fiesta time.

The 3 of us hired a van and an English speaking driver to take us through the north of Laos for 2 days and dropping us off in a town called Vien Viang about halfway between here and the capital city of Vietienne. Along the way we will stop in a few villages and see several sites that were heavily bombarded by American forces during the Vietnam War (or American War as the locals refer to it). This all starts tomorrow at 7:30am. I’m not sure of the internet situation along the way so I may not update for a couple of days.

I woke up rather late this morning. I had my first full night of rest in an air conditioned room. I stayed a bit outside of the center of town but moved this morning to a cheaper room with just a fan. I rented a bicycle this morning, which is one of Luang Prabangs main modes of transportation. The scenery around the city is amazing. The nearby mountains are very close to the city and with the weather rainy and cloudy like it has been has added to the atmosphere. There is a low mist over the hills as well that remind me a lot of how it was like in Rwanda.

I met up with a couple of Israeli girls that were on the boat from Thailand and we checked out the Royal Palace Museum which used to house the royal family in the Kingdom of Luang Prabang centuries ago. A few things of interesting note were the sizes of the bedrooms. The queen’s bedroom was almost half the size of the King’s and the King had 2 large mirrors while the queen did not. Whether not this is how it was set up during their reign is unknown. Another interesting room at the museum was where they keep all the gifts that other countries gave to Laos. The Chinese display had an assortment of tea glasses and other dining sets and the Russians gave memorbilia of the space race and several pins and medals. The United States also gave space exploration gifts like a miniature lunar module as well as the key to Los Angeles presented from the mayor. We entered a Wat on the museum grounds but it wasn’t very interesting.

We went our separate ways and I went off to take care of some money exhange at the bank. I think I got ripped off pretty hard with the exchange rate since I used Thai baht to purchase American dollars. It does feel good to have a few greenies in my pocket now since most of the hotels quote their prices in US dollar and if you use local currency you will pay more. My hotel right now is $10 and they tried to charge me 100,000 Lao Kip which comes out to nearly $13. If you are going to the market or buying something from a food vendor it is better to use Lao Kip because they are smaller. Even tough the smallest Kip note is 1,000. The money has been pretty frustrating.

I keep running into a lot of the people that were on the slow boat from Thailand. There was a really nice Swedish girl who was traveling on her own as well as a 2 ski instructors from Poland, a lone guy from London and a couple of Austrians. I want to make my way to the waterfalls near Luang Prabang but I did not want to do it alone so I have been trying to organize a plan for tomorrow. There was another group of people that went today by bicycle but they said it took 3 hours and they returned by tuk-tuk with their bikes. It was suggested that if I can find a place to rent a motorbike that it would be a good idea. You may have think I haven’t learned my lesson but it is really safe here as the roads are pretty flag and the traffic is very light. Also, they drive on the RIGHt side of the road so even on my bicycle today I was very comfortable and didn’t have to worry about which way I was allowed to turn and can focus more on riding.

I’ll find out tonight who will be joining me because it won’t be any fun alone. I think the Swedish girl is the only one who confirmed, the rest have plans or just flat out don’t want to go.

Around 5pm I took a walk up to Phu Si temple on the top of Mt. Phu Si which is just a hill in the center of Luang Prabang. That is pronounced Poo-see. So yea, the jokes are plentyful when you go to Phu Si mountain to view the Phu Si temple. The view from the top is great and the walk up is short. On the way down there are several statues of Buddha in various positions. All in all great photograph opportunities.

Buddha sleeping on Phu Si hill

I’m cheesing a bit but who wouldn’t with a view like that?

Breath taking view of Luang Prabang

What an amazing river.

I started on Tuesday morning. May 1st 2007, my final day after 2 months in Thailand. I was picked up by mini-bus from my hotel at 9:30am and we headed north to the border town of Chang Kong in Thailand. After everyone else on the bus got their visa paperwork taken care of we crossed into Laos. Unfortunately, my planning ahead didn’t pay off because I paid about $20 more for my 30 day visa and everyone that waited to get it on arrival actually got a full 30 days for the same price as a 15 day visa. Oh well, it was peace of mind for me.

We stayed over night in Huay Xai on the Laos side of the border. It was a quiet town with very little to do. I had met with a couple of older Americans from Seattle. Frank and Janice. They are sailing around the world right now and have been at it for 4 years. They docked in southern Thailand and took a train up to Chiang Mai and are now visiting Laos before eventually making their way back down to their boat and heading off towards India and the finally the Red Sea. Frank has a lot of stories to tell and his experiences are very interesting.

My first taste of Laos was taking a stroll through Huay Xai and noticing the many stores that supply all kinds of alcohol. A few of the bottles looked interesting so I took a closer look. Inside a small 1/5th bottle was a scorpion and in another larger bottle had an actual cobra inside. I assume it is some sort of Laos moonshine. If I thought I could get it through customs I would probably bring some home.

The next morning we boarded a slow boat on the Mekong River at around 11:30am. The boat was packed full of tourists heading towards Luang Prabang like myself. We thought we had gotten there earlier enough but most of the front of the boat was full so we headed towards the back. The first few rows are cushioned seats that looked like they were tore out of the back of a van and the rest are thin benches that lead all the way to the back. They are meant for people to sit 2 on a bench but most people spread out and took a bench for themselves. It is currently low season in South East Asia so we were able to pull it off.

In the back of the boat a group of guys and girls boarded late and came on quite rowdy. Within 30 minutes of leaving the dock whiskey bottles came out and it was apparent the back of the boat was to become a party. The culprits were 2 Canadians, 2 Americans (Philidelphians I might add) and a French guy. They mus have met in Chiang Mai or taken a bus to the border together. It was all fun for awhile but after 6 hours on a boat and the Canadian guy drunk and not shutting up everyone in the vacinity started to get annoyed. The guy would not stop talking the entire time and I don’t think he looked out at the scenery once.

I should talk about the scenery. Not since Rwanda have I seen such stunning landscape. I had heard that Laos boasted good scenery but it wasn’t till we were about 2 hours into the trip that I realized it for myself. The Mekong river doesn’t get overly populated till you get down towards Cambodia so the northern Laos portion is virtually untouched. You can go miles without seeing any signs of civilization only to come across a quaint little village along the banks with children running down to the shore to wave at passing boats.

The first day of the trip took about 7 hours and we eventually stopped in a very small village called Pak Beng. Most passangers on the boat didn’t have any accommodation booked so it was a mad scramble for a bed. A lot of the rooms were nothing more than a bed and a fan. It didn’t really matter whether or not you actually got a fan because at 10pm the electricity was shut off and you were stuck in the dark without running water. I picked out a decent looking spot, took my cold water shower and laid in bed. It was brutal once the fan shut off but I was eventually able to sleep. Pak Beng is the first place I have seen fireflies since we moved from New York in 1991. They were a welcome sight.

The boat left at 9:30am the next morning and we once again were treading down the Mekong River. Again, I was in awe, staring out the side of the boat at the rock formations along the banks, the sand dunes and the lush green jungle that bended with the flow of the brown murky Mekong. The river originates in China but Laos boasts more of its length than any other South East Asian country. It is the lifeline of the people and I look forward to seeing more of it down river.

We arrived in Luang Prabang at around 4:30pm today and everyone went their own ways to find accommodation. I eventually settled on a rather pricey spot but still cheap considering. I wanted air conditioning and a hot shower since the last few nights were a bit difficult to get through. At $15 per night you can’t really go wrong.

One of the most difficult parts of traveling in Laos so far is dealing with the money. There are 3 currencies in wide use here; US dollar, Lao Kip and Thai Baht. I tend to stick with Thai baht since it really is my 2nd currency. I even found myself converting US dollar into Thai baht to make it easier for me. I have just gotten used to pricing things in baht for the time being. I am sure that will go away after a few days back home.

Laos is far from the experience that Thailand was. I have only been in the country for 3 days but the differences are obvious. Laos is quiet. Most people are asleep early and there isn’t much to do after 10pm. It is a communist country so on a few buildings you can actually see the old soviet flag being flown and in all the markets you can buy t-shirts with communist symbols on it. In the streets of Luang Prabang it is a mixture of motorbikes, bicycles and pedestrians walking. Spotted throughout the town are the bright orange robes of monks walking to and from the variety of wats or temples that are here.

I haven’t had much time to do anything and I am going to head back to my hotel now and get some rest but there is plenty to do around Luang Prabang so I should have interesting photos and stories over the next week.

Hanging out of the boat on the Mekong River.

Pak Beng. This small village was the halfway overnight stopping point on the way to Luang Prabang.

Classic Mekong River

After 3 days, 2 of which were spent on a slow boat down the Mekong River, I am finally at Luang Prabang, Laos.

It is time to take a shower and get a good night’s sleep. I will post more tomorrow when I am refreshed. Just wanted to give an update that I made it safely.

Ok, this is not a full review because I’m still in Thailand but I have to talk about the pizza I had last night and tonight here in Chiang Mai. Yes I had pizza 2 nights in a row. With a big trip ahead of me tomorrow I didn’t want to take any risks.

I was walking down the street last night looking for a place to eat and a sign pointing in towards a collection of bars said “Danny’s Pizza & Fast Food: Thin Crust Italian Style” I thought, hmmm… they know enough to call attention to thin crust so maybe it is worth a shot. I put in my order for a 9″ pizza with cheese only. In a few minutes it was out. First reason this place was so good was that when I asked for garlic powder they actually brought some out. No other place on my trip has been able to offer me that and I never realized how much I missed the stuff till I was never able to find it. I poured it all over my pizza and began to go to work. It was gone in the matter of minutes. This pizza worked because it was simple. A lot of places try too hard to go for the big Sicilian style or Pizza Hut style and they fail. The bread, the sauce and the cheese all good taste and none were overpowering which is another flaw with pizza sometimes. The crust was actually thin which has been advertised before but never perfected.

My only gripe with Danny’s or soon to be called Mo’s, is that it advertises pizza by the slice but does not actually offer it. Oh well, I can still say without a doubt this was the best pizza I have had during my 4 months on the road.

I asked to speak to the owner and surprisingly it was not Danny but rather a fairly young Thai girl who purchased it from Danny about a month ago. I was actually curious as to what nationality Danny was since the pizza was so good. I was disappointed to hear that he was not American but rather Australian. Oh well, great pizza none-the-less.

Look for the sign that says “Mo’s Pizza” in about a week.

My passport was returned yesterday with my Laos visa inside so I am officially allowed in the country. I don’t leave till Tuesday morning so it is going to be one last night of partying in Thailand. Tuesday, or May 1st is Labor Day here and it is celebrated in much of the same fashion as the United States. A day off with nothing important to do except relax and eat.

The weather has been strange lately. South East Asia is entering the monsoon season so the winds pick up at night and the rain comes on strong and sudden. The temperature in Chiang Mai the last few days has exceeded 100 degrees topping out at 107. I laid out in the sun today for no more than 20 minutes and I am red. The weather in Laos is supposed to be a bit milder but probably not much.

I will probably report back once I arrive in Laos. The journey will take a full 2 days of travel by bus and slow boat on the Mekong River. I have to stay one night in a small trading village along the banks of the river before continuing on to the main city.

Well, I am in Chiang Mai now once again and staying at one of my favorite guest houses so far on the trip. Nuan Pranee House. Great staff and they have been really helpful and the rooms are awesome. My plan was to head to Laos tomorrow but due to poor planning on my part I need a few more days here. U.S. citizens are granted a 15 day visa on arrival to Laos for around $20. The problem is that I need a 30 day visa. I knew this before I started my trip but I guess over time with other things on my mind I let that small fact slide out of memory. So, now I have to go through the red tape. I am sending my passport to Bangkok tomorrow morning and it should take 3 full days so on Saturday I will have my passport stamped with a 30 day Laos visa and can make my way north. I would have preferred to do this in Bangkok so that I just left my passport at the Lao embassy rather than mailing it off but the agency I am using for the visa is responsible if anything happens to it.

I can think of worse places to be stuck for an additional few days and this sticks to the pattern of the rest of my time in Thailand. I may look into some excursions outside of Chiang Mai for the weekend and I will probably be leaving on Monday now. This gives me plenty of time to read up on my Laos book. There is a great night market here that I can use to get any last minute items since it will be much more difficult to find once I’m across the border. Luckily the Lao language is very similar to Thai so I can use most of the stuff I have learned. The numbers are all the same so I can proudly say that I can count to 100 in both Thai and Lao now. For the next few days I don’t foresee any major updates so maybe check back early next week or over the weekend.

After another week in Bangkok for reasons explained at a later time I am heading home. It has been a great trip so far but sometimes you just have to go back to where you come from.

Fortunately, I am going to my home away from home… back to Chiang Mai for a couple of days. The place that helped me recover from the accident and the place I spent 3 interesting weeks. Once again my plan has changed and I have decided to head north again and use Chiang Mai as a planning point for my trip into Laos. I need some time away from the night life and party atmosphere of Thailand and will get some much needed quiet time in Laos. I will be armed with a good book for the long boat journeys on the Mekong River and should be sipping Beer Laos on the banks in Luang Prahbang by next weekend. Laos was one of my pre-trip highlights and I am excited to finally get back into a 3rd world country. Thailand has been fun, don’t get me wrong, but I could be doing what I am doing here at home.

I’ll check in before I head into Laos. Till then…

I’m back with another beer and pizza review.

BEER: THAILAND

Lots of choices here in Thailand so I will stick with the main ones. Heineken is the largest import. You can get Stella Artois, Budweiser, Corona and other imports just about anywhere.

Chang: The cheapest and most widespread beer in Thailand and easily the worst. It is the beer with the highest alcohol content in Thailand. They even coined the term for the day after a binge of Chang Beer… a Changover. If you have very little money and you are concerned about beer costs, this is your beer.

Singha: My beer of choice, aside from Heineken, while in Thailand. It has a sweet flavor which gives it a little more taste then all the others and isn’t as heavy as Heineken. They serve Singha Light which is the only light beer I have been able to find while traveling.

Leo: I only tried Leo once and it was rather warm so I can’t give a fair judgment other than that I don’t see too many people drinking it. It is another locally brewed beer.

PIZZA: THAILAND

I finally hit a country that actually knows how to do pizza at least close to home.

In Chiang Mai it was a guest house named “Same Same” inside the old city walls with a small pizza vendor that served 10″ pies just the way I like them, thin and with good bread. Also in Chiang Mai outside a night club was the first “pizza-by-the-slice” vendor so I grabbed one of those and it was a nice change from the personal pies that you usually get.

In Pattaya at the Royal Garden Plaza there is a food court on the top level that also had excellent pizza-by-the-slice. Parmesan cheese had been rare up till this point but luckily they had both cheese and crushed red pepper. Finally!

I actually haven’t had any non-chain pizza in Bangkok so I have no review of pizza here but if I do before I leave I will update.

So my days in Pattaya are over. With the end of Songkran also comes my return to Bangkok to start putting serious consideration into the final portion of my trip. I don’t know if I will make it the full 6 months. Maybe a change of pace will make the difference. I have, for the better part of 2 months, been basically relaxing.

My week in Pattaya was very nice. Lots of things to do and interesting people to hang out with. Mark a co-worker from my previous job was visiting with his wife to see his son-in-law’s newborn child. We went out for drinks Friday and Saturday night at a local English pub to watch premiership soccer. It was quite a surreal location to see someone from home at but it was a good time with good conversation.

The rest of my time in Pattaya was spent hanging out with the hotel staff drinking tequila and playing board games. Pattaya is supposed to be a beach town but it rained almost every day so I was limited to the amount of sun I got. At the end of the week Songkran festival began in Pattaya and I purchased my water gun and hit the town. I didn’t take my camera out too much because you can get wet literally anywhere. Mostly children, farang, and bar girls partake in the festival but anyone is fair game to splash. I had a tiny water gun so my attempts were rendered useless. Several groups of teenagers and kids would ride around in the back of pick up trucks and dump buckets of water on unsuspecting pedestrians. I got hit with a few buckets while riding a pick up taxi. It is all in good fun although some people do get out of hand. I put on my bathing suit and tshirt and expected the worst. I am glad I stayed in Pattaya for the festival because it was a really laid back event. I got to Bangkok on Sunday and the fun just wasn’t the same.

Happy New Year!!!

Everyone fully loaded

Not a good day to ride a motorbike