Follow Me Around the World

Today’s entry is bringing me back to old faithful, awkward bathroom situations.  OK so I’m biased and all of my bathroom situations revolve around being in the guys bathroom (at least the ones I can talk about in this blog).

my daily thought on life today is about the “every other urinal” situation.  Every guy knows what I’m talking about.  It is like the unwritten code of going to the bathroom in a public restroom.  You walk in and see 6, 10, 12 urinals, you’re like “sweet.”  The jubilation comes because you know that you can get to a stall with no one next to you on either side.  “Hey, there are plenty to go around, why should we all bunch up?”

Well you shouldn’t and that is the proper etiquette of going to the bathroom in a public restroom.  If the possibility arises for you to take a stall one over from someone you do it.  No questions asked, think of it as your personal space in a public environment.  The ideal situation is for their to be loads and loads of them so when people start to file in like after a movie, the middle of an inning or halftime, there are no worries.

The tricky part is when you don’t have that luxury.  When there are only a few or even no spots available, you really got to go and you are waiting in line.  This is where the awkwardness and anxiety comes in.  “Do I really have to go next to that guy?  Should I look down at the urinal, and try to read the brand they choose for this rather disgusting restroom?  Do I look straight ahead and hope for some comical graffiti?”  All of these are perfectly OK feelings and questions to have.  Well the easy answer to start with is, just with your gut instinct.  There is nothing wrong with looking straight ahead on the wall, noticing the lovely tiling, trying to look down and read the brand of urinal chosen, or even playing “let’s see if I can fill that blue thing blocking the bowl.”

What I can tell you are things never to do when you find yourself in a situation where the “every other stall” isn’t a possibility.

1.  Never engage the people next to you.  No “how they hanging,” “what a great half they had,” or “hey did you see that guy sliding in to second, what a putz.”  Please refrain, I know you are dying to do something to pass the time while you are stuck in this rather awkward situation of having to go extremely close to someone else.  Just do your business, get in and get out.

2.  Now some hygienists might disagree, but hand washing should be optional.  Are you going to tell me that the sink you are about to turn on and the soap dispenser you are going to use, are really going to be cleaner then when you just did?  I doubt it.  For all you hygienists out there, my suggestion is bring some hand sanitizer and slap that on after you get out of the restroom.

Thanks, those are my daily thoughts for today.

This entry was posted on Sunday, December 10th, 2006 at 9:29 am and is filed under Travel. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.