Eat your heart out, Liberace
I did something this morning that I usually avoid doing at all costs – I went sightseeing. In fact, on my personal Fun Scale, it rates right up there with cleaning toilets because the last thing I want to be doing on vacation is trudging through the heat with herds of other foreigners looking at stuff. Basically, you spend a bunch of time and pay an expensive entrance fee to look at something so you can say you looked at it. It’s so pointless.
So I thought I’d get some sightseeing out of the way right off the bat and then I could spend the rest of my time in Thailand doing the things I enjoy doing on vacation like drinking sugary iced coffee, eating weird food from street vendors, watching international news channels on satellite TV, and chasing monkeys. I chose to see the Grand Palace and the Wat Something Or Other that has the Emerald Buddha because they’re in the same complex, and then the Wat Pho that has the Reclining Buddha because it’s only a block away. I am nothing if not efficient.
I wandered around the Grand Palace complex feeling annoyed despite the big tacky gold thing (looks sort of like a big bell and they’re all over, no idea what they are) and a something like 30’x30′ outdoor sculpture that’s an exact replication of Angkor Wat (yay! now when people are like, “ooooh have you seen Angkor Wat?” I can confidently say yes without all the inconvenience of having to go Cambodia – strike another sightseeing debaucle off the list).
I was annoyed that is until I went into the building that houses the Emerald Buddha. Maybe the other foreigners thought I started weeping at the beauty of the hundreds of devotees kneeling in front of a monk giving a sermon (or whatever the Buddhist version is called), or the hushed spiritual atmosphere or something. But really, I wept because I have never seen a such a mind-blowingly glittery explosion of tackiness. It has to be the most spectacular example of High Gaudy ever created. It was like if Liberace converted to Buddhism and then was given an unlimited budget and manpower to create a cathedral-like shrine for this Emerald Buddha treasure. It was also a lot like my idea of heaven.
Then on to the Reclining Buddha, which is the biggest one in Thailand. And that means it’s really big. I forget how big exactly but it’s housed in this open building that’s the equivalent of about four stories and it takes up the whole space all the way to the ceiling. And it’s gold. How awesome is that? What it lacked in the whole Sea of Glittery Distraction element of the Emerald Buddha shrine it more than made up for in sheer mass of shiny-ness.
I am really pleased with my sightseeing choices. Conscience eased, personal aesthetic satisfied.
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Favorite random thing today: the sweetest, most innocent looking little 5-year-old Thai boy wearing a t-shirt that said, “F**k you, you f**kin’ f**k”.
Least favorite random thing today: sitting next to a couple in a cafe who I swear had to be from LA because who else blabs about their friend doing a spot on a TV show, seeing someone’s car in front of the studio, how Rob is a Taurus so of course once he gets an idea there’s no stopping him, and says “that’s huge” at regular intervals? It was horrible.
Tags: Bangkok Sept 06, Thailand
sandra_101
Thank Ram you’re all right and doing fine in Bangkok.
The tacky gold bell-shaped things are called “stupa” in sanskrit: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stupa
I love demonstrating that I’m human by typing numbers.
Thought I saw you on the street today in Los Feliz. Missed you.
I remembered the stupa thing about 10 minutes after finishing writing this. I swear.
Speaking of Ram – all around the inner wall of the Grand Palace courtyard there is an intricate mural depicting scenes from the Ramayana. I got to see one of the artists working on it. So awesome.
Give my love to P please!! I miss you both.