Look what I done got myself into this time…

With some helpful directions from a local man returning his car at the car agency, I headed off in my little VW, recalling how to drive on the other side of the car and road. It was a good 4 hours to Nelspruit, the main town closest to Kruger, probably the most well-known game park in South Africa. The ride was pretty uneventful, but it was interesting to see the large number of people trying to hitch rides along the side of the road, a definite no-no in the States. At one point, as I passed a very slum-my area, I noticed an increased number of people looking for rides. Not as if I would pick anyone up, but I couldn’t help but think that the large “Elevated hijacking area” signs posted along the road were not helping these people’s cause.

I got to Nelspruit and stopped at a little shopping center to pick up food and camping fuel for my trip inside Kruger. This would be the first test of my tent and all my new equipment. I headed north out of town, looking for a town called Hazyview, where I would spend the night just outside the park gate, ready to enter when the gates opened at 6am the next day. As I headed north, while stopped at a stoplight, a little black boy in the car next to me looked and smiled at me. I smiled back. His father looked around at me to see what his boy was looking at me, and as soon as he saw me, his face went sour. How awful. This man hated me, simply because I was white. The racism in South Africa is so deeply ground into everyone; I feel like I have stepped back in time (in relation to the US). I really have a very hard time with this.

I continued to Hazyview, getting lost in a not-so-nice area, where it quickly became apparent that I was lost and should not get out of the car to ask for directions. I turned around, tried to backtrack, got lost a few more times, and then finally found my way to Hazyview. I got to my campsite after dark, which gave me the perfect opportunity to set up my tent for the first time using only my headlamp. No problems. After talking a little to the hostel owners (many hostels provide camping areas in Africa), I went to sleep in my tent, listening to the hippos grunting down by the local river.

I woke up at something like 4:30 to pack up my tent and head into the park. It was still pitch black, and as I started to pack up, I heard something rustling in the bushes. Taking heed of advice I had heard, I climbed in my tent, closed the fly, and waited, listening to whatever this thing was. Hyena? I was told to stay in the tent if those things come around. Hippo? Apparently, more people die in Africa from hippo attacks than any other animal (or something like that). Some sort of cat, now climbing the tree, preparing to pounce on its prey, which was me? I finally got my wits about me and peeked outside, seeing nothing. I looked up in the tree for my cat, and saw nothing. Well, hell, I told myself, I gotta go. I laid my knife on the ground, open and ready, as if that would help anything, packed up my stuff, and headed off to Kruger.

I registered at the gate, bought a little map that came with bits of information about animals you might find inside and drove off down a dirt road. Ooh…I saw something…what’s this? I looked up in my little guide. Impalas – yes, I’ve never seen these before. Wow. Impalas. I later learned this is the classic novice reaction to impalas; I soon came to realize that, with something like 110,000 impalas in the park, I would come to hate these stupid things after a few hours.

I drove along as the sky turned all sorts of reds, yellows, and purples with the sunrise. Wha? Whoa. What was that? That was a frikkin’ elephant that I just passed on the side of the road. Should I turn around? Will I bother it? But I want to see it… I turned around, drove past slowly and turned around again, this time stopping right by it. He had moved a little off the road, but I sat and watched this huge thing wag his little dinky tail while eating some bushes. Wow. An elephant, and just right there.

I continued on, within a short while turning around a bend, only to see a huge rhinocerous right in the middle of the road. I stopped. Oh man…what do I do now? There’s a huge rhino in the middle of the road. What? What am I supposed to do now? His horn was huge, and from tip of his horn to his tail, he blocked the entire road. Well, I suppose I should just wait and let him do what he wants. He turned around and ran back into the bushes. I pulled up just to see his chubby butt running away into the woods. He’s a little scaredy guy.

A little while up the road, I saw another big thing. I had no idea what it was, but it was staring me down, big time. I looked it up in my book – a buffalo. Apparently, this was another of the Big 5 (the ultimate in animal sightings). Everyone in game parks talks about the Big 5, and they were different than what I thought – Elephant, Rhinocerous, Buffalo, Lion, and Leopard. Already, in the first 2 hours of driving, I had seen 3 out of 5. Not bad for 8 in the morning. I took some photos of this buffalo while he continued to stare me down. Later I learned that the buffalo is one of the most unpredictable and dangerous of all the wild animals; you never know when they’ll charge at you. Luckily, this guy was content enough to stare at me while I snapped a few photos and then drove on.

A short while later I saw a few giraffes, and felt content to have breakfast at one of the rest camps scattered throughout the park. I made camping reservations for the rest of my time there (all accomodations, including camping, are done in gated camps that close at sunset; you are not sleeping out in the wild with the animals, although this can be done at some other parks throughout Africa). After breakfast, I set off again, spotting all sorts of weird little flightless birds as well as a pack of baboons. While I was looking at the baboons, I saw a car behind me turn around and come my way. Look! Look at the baboons I told them. “Yes, but did you see the lion?” No! “Well, come on then.”

I turned around and joined the few cars to look at the lion. I could see it barely, out in the woods, his head peeking from behind some trees. As if this lion knew exactly what to do, he slowly strutted toward the road, giving us an extreme close-up view. I could see the veins in his legs, this immense animal. He stopped, peed on a tree, and took a yawn. I was so close that I could see green stuff in his teeth. There were five cars surrounding him and he was directly across the road from me, such that I looked out my drivers window and he was right there. If that thing felt intimidated at all, I thought, he’s coming right for me. I’m his direct target. I rolled up my window immediately, as if that would give me any sort of protection at all if he really wanted at me. He casually strutted right in front of my car, crossing the road, and passed off into the other side of the bush. Wow.

That was the only lion I saw the whole time. The only cat, in fact. I never completed the Big 5, not seeing a leopard, which are notoriously the most difficult to spot. But, with zebras, giraffes, hippos, crocodiles, warthogs (which are funny-looking things, like punk-rock pigs with a mohawk and some mean tusks), wildebeests (also called gnus), a jackal, vervet monkeys (which have amazingly bright blue balls), and all sorts of hooved animals and birds, I had no complaints with what I saw those three days. The place is completely timeless, a glimpse at the Earth and how it was millions of years ago, before people went and screwed it all up.

At night I headed to my camp, hilariously setting up my little one-person tent amongst camps with huge house-sized tent complexes. I was quick to learn that my camping fuel was not compatible with my stove, so I bought some firewood and cooked up a can of spaghetti over the fire. (You wanna talk about hobo-living, the next night I ate a can of beans heated over the fire.) So much for my eggs and coffee for breakfast…I went to sleep early, listening to lions grunting off in the distance – on the other side of the fence.
I spent three days in the park; my only wish for next time would be a higher car (the grass in most parts was eye-level), and at least another set of eyes, helping me to spot things. While the speed limits are kept very low, and you’re usually the only car around, it’s still hard to spot everything while scanning both sides of the road, behind, and in front. I can only imagine the things I missed.

I had a very intimate moment with some elephants crossing the road. I saw a herd in front of me, and continued to pull up to watch them cross. When elephants are in herds, these are usually matriarchal herds with all females and some babies. They keep the males around until they get a bit older, and then they kick them out, where they either join a bachelor herd or wander around solo, which is what I usually saw. As I approached this herd, one elephant ran out from the bush, snorting a little, looking at me. This is apparently a signal to the matriarch that there’s something threatening. Not only do they grunt, but they also send ultrasonic messages as well. Well, I was the threatening thing, and the matriarch at the back of the line, popped out of the bush, ears spread out, making its tipical elephant roar, or whatever it is. It was coming straight at me.

Oh. OK. Uh, I’ll go in reverse. See, I don’t want to harm you, I’m moving away. Oh man, I have an elephant charging after me. She quickly calmed down as she watched me back off, and they passed along their way. I sat for a while, giving them plenty of time to pass. I later learned that, along with the buffalos, the elephant is one of the most feared animals in the bush, particularly the matriarch, or perhaps a lonely bachelor when he’s in musk. It would be nice to know these things before you venture out into the park, but, trust me, when faced with a huge elephant, rhino, buffalo, or whatever it is in front of you, you learn very quickly. This is their home; they do whatever they want. You just watch and stay out of their way.

Tags: South Africa, Tag Index

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