BootsnAll Travel Network



Lima is a Lemon

I went into the central historic section yesterday to see what Lima has to offer.  This is a sprawling, ugly city of eight million.  I think this is the first place on this leg of the trip that I truly do not like.  San Jose, Costa Rica and Guatemala City were suspect, but I did not get enough time in either to condemn.  They also have a fraction of the number of people of Lima.  I am staying in San Isidro section which is quite a distance from downtown and even further from the airport.  There is not much here for a tourist – mainly residential and some financial business.  The taxi driver I had yesterday decided to take me on a tour of his city.  I knew this would cost money, but taxis are relatively cheap and I needed the entertainment.  Our first landmark was his home.  That was probably the best site of the drive.

Speaking of driving, Lima drivers are the worst I have ever encountered.  It is quite obvious that none of them have ever had any training.  They have a habit of straddling two lanes so that they can choose either one when needed.  I calculate that they beep their horn at least once per minute.  This is not an exaggeration.  Horns are used regularly throughout Latin America, more than regularly in Peru and constantly in Lima.  I did a survey of drivers yesterday from a corner and concluded that at least 95% are male.  Jillian and I wondered if females use the horns like the males.  We got a quick answer when a woman pulled up and honked a couple of times.  Horns are used for hello, careful, I’m coming through, out of my way and $!&#%$^%^@**.  Given how many times I have seen cars and buses pull into the path of other vehicles the $!&#%$^%^@** reason is most prevalent.  Lima is a town where you don’t hesitate in putting on your seatbelt and you constantly focus on not yelping.

The taxi driver’s name was Richard.  We laughed at that.  It took a half hour to see all of the sites after his house before he dropped me off at Plaza de Armas.  It is supposedly called Plaza Mayor nowadays, but I got odd looks when I called it that.  Apparently, the tourist board has not told the locals about the change.  I went to the cathedral on the square and it is now a museum charging admission.  I overheard a Peruvian going nuts that a church was charging admission.  Inside I found an original painting of the Virgin Mary breastfeeding Jesus.  This one was a little different than the Cusco version in that the milk was spraying out in three streams rather than dripping onto his cheek.  I remember when breastfeeding in public was a controvery in the States in the 70s.  There certainly is no shame in doing so here or in the rest of the third world.  Maybe that can be attributed to paintings of Mary spraying Jesus with her milk?  The only other item of interest in this church was that crucified Jesus was not as scary as the ones up in the mountains.  (Anita – I’ll look forward to seeing the Jesus babies!  Mike – Roman spear makes sense… a minor gash in American version of Jesus is almost spilling entrails here!)

I went to three other churches and all of them were closed.  One had a museum attached which was open, but I was not into going inside.  Apparently, the Vatican has decided to charge admission or not be open here in Lima.  Maybe the missionaries I am meeting here are really here to convert locals from Catholicism to rather than from their heathen animistic ways?  I watched the changing of the guard at the presidential palace on Plaza de Armas.  It occurs every day around noon.  It was basically a parade around the plaza full of pomp and circumstance.  I wondered if the marchers are paid a decent salary for thirty minutes of work each day or if they leave downtown jobs and change clothes to do this. 

I spent the rest of the afternoon walking around looking for a soul.  Lima doesn’t seem to have one.  The colonial part of the city is the worst I have seen with few nice buildings and many modern ugly ones.  Making a historical center seems to have been an afterthought after what I assume was destruction of the real history.  Its lack of soul is apparent by the lack of souls.  For a city of eight million, I doubt you’ll find an emptier downtown.  The shopping malls further away are where the real action exists.  This city pales in comparison to Quito (1.7 million) and its more equivalent cousin Bogota (7-8 million) as far as culture and beauty goes.  By the end of the day, I was not impressed with Lima.  I thought of going to some museums, but I would rather wait for more visits to the living museums in the smaller cities, towns and ruins that are upcoming.

I’ll be back in Lima once or twice more because that is how the bus and airline system works here, but I doubt I will go into downtown again.  Hopefully, this is the Newark of South America.



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