Taipei and my last day, infectious eczematoid dermatitis and me
Monday, July 10th, 2006The doctor immediately diagnosed infectious eczematoid dermatitis, a kind of allergic eczema. But he doesn’t know the cause. He thinks the fact that I’ve suffered from prickly heat before, and I’m sensitive to sunlight, heat and humidity; the allergic reaction to ‘OFF!’ (possibly DEET) could have made the condition worse.
I’ve been prescribed 6 different pills and was given an injection. I’ve been told to see another doctor for another injection when I get to Singapore. And that I should not use these pills for more than 2 weeks otherwise it could affect my body badly. He tells me to stay away from sunlight, heat and humidity (I’m thinking of the countries I’m going to next) even wearing protective clothing. I am to stay away from coffee, alcohol and spicy foods. Everything he’s told me I can handle. Then he tells me my legs are going to be scarred for up to 2 years! But it will go back to its normal colour eventually. I’m left dumbstruck. I thought maybe a month or two the most. But 2 years?!!
After swallowing the disgusting tasting pills and phoning Ling, I walk in the pouring rain to the internet cafe. I am numb. At least my UV umbrella is useful in sun and rain. Yating had called me a typical Taiwanese girl when I told her about my UV umbrella. They carry UV umbrellas here so why not. I feel bad for my legs. I feel shitty that I didn’t go to the hospital sooner especially after all the crap that I sprout about health and me being responsible for myself. I feel I’m a lawyer who has been negligent and I should not be left responsible for me because I am just crap. I’m the only person responsible and I’ve been rubbish at it. Now, I sit here, accepting the consequences. Ling tells me it won’t take that long for the scars to disappear. At this moment they’re still blistering, not even brown, not even scars yet but you can see it going that way. Yes, I feel sorry for myself, for my legs, goddamitt! And also so so so angry with myself! How can I make it up to you? How can I make it better for you? For myself, my body, me, my whole responsibility.
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