I'm fucking afraid. Someone I don't know will be staying at my place and she SEEMS OK but I hope she doesn't hurt my cats......my personal life is suffering. It's very hard work making this trip and I don't have any real.......no one understands. I don't even know what I'm going to do: whether to go to LA or Europe or Asia or Egypt......and I know there's always "later" but when will that be? I know things will work out somehow, but there's no way I can describe the feeling of fear and like I'm looking into an abyss. That's how I felt even before I left for DC, and that's just DC! Yeah, it turned into a good thing ultimately, but it was scary. Maybe LA is it. I keep getting those psychic signs. Well, yeah, there's someone there. I have to start working though......at something.
The tragedy of ambition is that you move on and leave people behind. Or maybe they leave you. It does lead somewhere else, somewhere new, but the pain of being in that transitional place.........kind of like a trip to the dentist.
I regret not getting to know my former CEO better, oh many men I wanted to get closer to but just couldn't do it. Weird, didn't know at those times that I was surrounded by so many gorgeous awesome men cause I was obsessed with ONE guy who was not around. You can call me neurotic but that's how it was.