Melbourne, Australia

Well, my time in Australia is nearly up. Has it really been five weeks since I arrived in Perth? Well... yes! Part of me thinks "it doesn't feel anywhere near that long" and part of me thinks "it feels like I've been here for ever" so I guess the average works out about right. Anyway, let me tell you what I've been doing in Melbourne over the weekend.

I've had 4 full days here, but must admit I've been rather unadventurous. In fact, of the two things I'd thought of doing before I got here (Ramsay St, home of TV soap Neighbours and the Great Ocean Road, home of... lots of birds and stuff) I did neither!

The hostel is (as usual) pretty close to the centre of the city, which Australians (gratifyingly, for me as a geographer) call the CBD, and so I've been in and out of it quite a lot. One of Melbourne's famous landmarks - apparently - is its tram network, and they do run out past where I'm staying, although to be honest, I don't mind walking 15 minutes to avoid paying the fare. I have heard it said that most people do mind walking, but also avoid paying the fare: it seems that the tram company is very benevolent. In the end, I only caught the tram twice, on a return trip to Albert Park. On the way out it took me so long to figure out what ticket I needed to buy that I had to get off before I'd bought one! (That's my story, and I'm sticking to it.) Feeling rather guilty, on the way back I bought a return ticket, and my conscience was relieved.

Albert Park, as I mentioned, is the home of the Australian Grand Prix. In a typical piece of Chris-timing, I have managed to be here a week before the Grand Prix takes place. This, however, has its condolences as I was able to walk almost all the way around the track. I hadn't realised that it's actually just made up of the roads in the park, and so there was a flurry (well, almost: Australians aren't known for their flurrying, except when there's beer involved) of activity as trucks drove around putting up advertising hoardings and so forth. I seemed to be the only tourist stupid enough to arrive a week early for the race, so got a few funny looks from workmen as I walked around holding a camera. Still, it was pretty cool to walk around the circuit - I even went the right way, which I wasn't sure of until I got to the Pit Straight, where the garages are all ready to receive the teams and drivers. Sadly, I didn't get overtaken by Schumacher on the back straight at 180mph, but you can't have everything. There was a bloke on a bike cycling round though, so there's something I suppose.

I should mention at this point that before I went out to Albert Park, I'd been up the tallest building in town (in fact, The Tallest Office Block In The Southern Hemisphere) to have a look around. There is a proper viewing platform; I wasn't just nosing around people's offices, and it was there that I saw Albert Park only 3km away, as well as the rest of the city stretching out into suburbia. Whilst up there I spotted the Spirit of Tasmania ferry that I kept bumping into in Sydney Harbour (not bumping as in crashing, you understand...) docked before it headed off to Tassie. (My photos of this are winging their way home at the moment, and should appear on the website in the next 10 days or so.)

Of course, the moment I walked out onto the street I had completely forgotten which direction Albert Park was. Puzzling somewhat, I decided first to try and obtain a map, but that was a lot harder than it sounds, as all the tourist maps only cover the centre of the city, and bookshops seemed keener to sell me maps of England than Melbourne. Go figure. Anyway, eventually the bright idea of asking at the tourist information booth popped into my head, so I did, and that was how I ended up getting a tram. This paragraph would make more sense near the beginning, wouldn't it? Never mind.

So, on Saturday I spent the day wandering around the city, including the rather laughable "Chinatown" and "Greek" precincts, which seemed to consist of a couple of banks and a few restaurants - not really what I was expecting from such a multicultural city. More impressive, perhaps, is the Italian district in the suburb of Carlton where there's a whole street full of pizzerias! This being Grand Prix season, of course, there were Ferrari banners strung out across the awnings of many of them.

On Saturday evening I went to see Mel Gibson's new movie "The Passion" which has come out in Australia almost a month before it does so in the UK. It's an incredible film (if you haven't heard about it, it shows with bloody detail the last 12 hours of the life of Christ) and I'd strongly recommend you to see it, whatever you think of the story.

Sunday was a pretty quiet day. After going to church in the morning (the congregation of 300 seemed very small compared to the church in Sydney where I went, which has over 9000 people through its doors every weekend!) I attacked a large book I'd bought - well, figuratively speaking. The hostel has a reading room with very temptingly comfortable sofas in, and I have spent rather a lot of time there over the last 4 days.

Today (Monday), after the rigamarole of checking out by 10am and storing my bag in a locker, I hired a bike - a bargain at only $10 for the day. (Bargains are important to me at the moment as I am rather short of cash!) I wish I'd done it before actually: it's a great way to see a city, especially one so cyclist-friendly. Melbourne brings its own challenges though, as the trams make interesting jousting partners along the streets, and they have a bizarre rule at intersections in the centre that to turn right you pull left and wait for the lights to change, then charge across the intersection before you get broadsided by a tram. Being slightly insane, I cycled out to the nearest motorway to try and ride on it. Sadly, Melbourne seems to be the only Aussie city which actually bans cyclists on its expressways. Such a shame... I just wanted to say I'd ridden on the M1.

Being slightly more insane, I have a flight to New Zealand at 9am tomorrow (Tuesday). Well, that in itself isn't insane I suppose, but I have decided to spend another night in the airport. Evidently, the memories of my night in Singapore airport a little over 5 weeks ago have faded sufficiently that I need reminding what a night with no sleep feels like.

So, that was Australia! I suppose I could do a quick summary or something here:

Best thing - Sydney Harbour, with the Bridge, Opera House, ferries (and crashes), walks and cliff edges: a really interesting place in a fascinating city.

Worst thing - Adelaide city centre. Sorry, I haven't been able to forgive it for being so dull!

Another "worst thing" that I just remembered - Spending the best part of two days on a train sat next to the smelliest man alive. The lingering smoke from his cigarettes just about blocked out his BO and bad breath. Just about.

Nicest city - After looking over my shoulder to check that no Melbourne residents are looking, I'd have to say Sydney. It's a very close-run thing though, as Melbourne's really nice. Perth, Brisbane and Canberra would come in joint 3rd, with Adelaide just behind, but only because of the hills and beaches surrounding it.

Righty ho, time to sign off. I'm about to fly even further away!