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This is what happens when Allison picks the dinner spot.

Tuesday, September 9th, 2008

Last night we ate dinner at a ‘point place’ in a nearby soi. I’ve been a frequent patron here, though I generally get take-away as the soi is a bit smelly due to its proximity to a canal. Since we needed a break from our box and knew we’d save at least five plastic bags by NOT getting take-away, we took plates full of rice and spicy mussels to the single empty table. This table had no chairs and was on the opposite side of the soi from the others, next to stacks of random stuff (tables, pots, boards, car parts, whatever), implying that it wasn’t intended to be used. However, there were no other options and the guy got it set up for us, setting out some plastic stools and the jar of fish sauce. He seemed hestitant.

We sat down at opposite ends so that we were at an awkwardly long distance from one another, necessary as the occasional car that decides to squeeze down these narrow alleys will take out anything that isn’t aligned with the walls. Within 30 seconds I could hear squeaking from below. Frantic squeaking that can only be produced by Bangkok rats anticipating point-place remnants.

I ignored it for a minute or two, trying to figure out if Gabe could hear it or if I was imagining it. The squeaks continued and I finally made myself peer down towards the dark crevices in the stacks of stuff that was sitting next to me. It wasn’t just a rat, it was three possum-sized rodents hanging out around a hole in the ground, twitching their noses and looking at me like they were ready to fight for my dinner. There was an added touch in the form of a few cockroaches (also the size of possums), who appeared to be residents of the hole as well.

I calmly moved my stool next to Gabe and into the potential path of a taxi, deciding that I could deal with a head-on collision more calmly than these dinner companions. The look on Gabe’s face confirmed that yes, he noticed them, and we continued to eat while hovering at the far end of the table. We began to shovel it in a little faster once the boldest of the three scurried up a stray board next to us, knocking it over in the process and causing his friends to become a bit more skittish.

We didn’t talk too much, just averted our eyes from the ground and finished our food. We agreed that we weren’t in the mood to linger and calmly got up, paid for our meal (luckily there’s no charge for the ambience) and exited the soi.

Please note that neither of us screamed, jumped onto the table or even abandoned our meal. We’ll probably even return sometime.

We’ve been in Bangkok faaaarrr too long…