From Bmore to BA

Chatting on-line with babes all day ´aint easy but somebody got ta do it

I owe my life to Craig´s list. Craig, thanks man. Not only did it help me pawn off all of my furniture when I moved out of the old place at school, but I also found my apartment and translator in Buenos Aires courtesy of the on-line site. Though, while Craig´s list should rightly be lauded for its indispensible value in creating business connections, probably it´s greatest asset is its incredible unintentional humor. While most (normal) people know it exclusively as a marketplace for furniture and concert tickets, the site has a little seedier side: a personals ad service for the bold, and a ¨casual encounters¨ listing for the really depraved.

How does this relate to Argentina? Well, an argument could be made that there is an inverse relationship between Craig´s list postings and Argentina´s popularity on the tourism circuit. Roughly a year ago when I was planning this whole little shinding there would be no more than 1 or two postings for housing on the ¨Craig´s List, Buenos Aires¨ site every few days; now it´s common to see a dozen or so every day. That is, tourism has absolutely been skyrocketing in this place…though, as any lawyer (or LSAT test taker) could easily point out, I´m probably just confusing ¨causality with coincidence¨ - LSAT be damned. Regardless, along with the dramatic increase in postings for 2 bedroom apartments overlooking Parque de Las Heras (a sort of Central Park), it, um *appears* there´s been an upsurge in postings on the personals as well. Probably to no one´s surprise, the bulk of these postings seem to be from middle-aged American or Gringo men who, oddly enough, all seem to be ¨good looking, successful businessmen-types.¨ How amazing, no? Even better are the ones who proudly tout their worthiness based upon the skin color they had the great fortune (please note sarcasm) to inherit or, better yet, ¨clean.¨ If you still don´t know by now you´re pretty oblivious my friend, but what these ¨gentlemen¨ are all seeking is not merely - as I´m extraordinarily famous for saying - a ¨hearty political discussion.¨ Rather, they are looking to get friendly with one of the locals; well at least those with breasts.

For example, look at this recent posting:

¨I am a North American businessman (USA) who is looking to make friends with an Argentine woman, between the ages of 35 and 50, for the purpose of cultural exchange, and romance. I am white, good looking, well educated, smart, humorous, a good listener, and a great teller of stories. You should be smart and good looking, with a good sense of humor. Preferably, you are between 5′4″ - 5′10″, and have a proportional figure. A picture would be appreciated.¨

A great teller of stories, eh? Well how about this one - there once was a man from Nantucket…

Sick of all of the same seedy postings, someone posted a hysterical one to put all of the would-be Gringo knights in shining armor waiting to take their poor, primitive but beautiful third world lover back to civilization - in the form of a Green Card - back in their place:

http://buenosaires.craigslist.org/m4w/145475567.html

Enjoy the laugh. And if you have a few extra minutes on your hand at work - and the company tracking devices are all off - look at some of the personals on Craig´s List. It gets an A in unintentional humor…You should get a kick out of it, and perhaps even a new wife.

P.S. Before you all accuse me - as an American expat living down here - of being no less contemptible than any of these aforementioned fools, please consider:

1. I don´t have any money to parade around…I probably have in my bank account what one of my friends working on Wall Street spends on dry-cleaning in a month. So take it or leave it baby!
2. I´m a young guy, so I´d be chasing girls wherever I am in the world
3. You don´t know me!

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This entry was posted on Tuesday, March 28th, 2006 at 3:14 pm and is filed under Buenos Aires. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.