An Episode of <i>E.R.</i> - THE GLOBAL TRIP 2004

An Episode of E.R.

DAY 112: Behind the scenes, the producers of "The Trinidad Show" (me) had been emailing certain former cast members in hopes they would return for another appearance. Like the returns of Diane on Cheers and Lilith on Frasier, Lara -- who I met in Lima, spent Christmas in Cusco with, partied with in La Paz, and toured the Bolivian salt flats with -- came back for some more episodes.

Little did we know that her comeback would be on an episode similar to one of the medical drama E.R.

LIKE THE TEAMS IN THE SECOND SEASON of CBS' The Amazing Race, Lara and I raced to a camp outside the Brazilian city Foz do Iguaçu near the world famous Iguaçu Falls, from different starting points that morning. I came straight from the north from Campo Grande, unknowingly one hour into the future of a new time zone, while Lara came from the south, with a little delay at her border crossing from Argentina into Brazil. We kept track of our locations with internet cafe stops and realized that we arrived in the city at about the same time, without ever running into each other. Lara, who wasn't about to attempt to start learning Portuguese too early, just hopped in a cab while I chose the long way for 28 real less: three public buses to take me to the finish line 12 km out of town. I had missed my stop on the second bus and fell behind, having to walk half a mile with my packs in the sun to catch my third bus. Lara was already reading a book in a hammock when I arrived.

"Hey there!" she called to me.

"Hey! When d'you get here?"

"About an hour ago."

Lara followed me to my guy's dorm room and we caught up on our travels as I sorted out my things. "I have something for you," I told her before surprising her with her favorite treat: a pack of Oreos.

She smiled but told me she was now on a diet.

LONELY PLANET described the Hostelling International Paudimar hostel as a "mini resort" and they weren't kidding. For just $9 (US), you stay in a secluded little paradise with big lawns and hammocks everywhere, internet access, a sports field, a swimming pool and a bar. I joined Lara -- aka "Ms. Croft" (as in Lara Croft of Tomb Raider fame) -- at the pool to cool down with a dip and a couple of cocktails. It was a perfect resting period after the race that morning.

LARA WAS GETTING LOW ON CASH so we decided to take the public bus back into town to look for a bank. We walked to the main road, hopped on the crowded bus, making fun of the little boy who hated my backpack swinging in his face. The bus took us to the central urban terminal, a collection of roofed platforms with metal signs hanging from above to designate your bus stop. As soon as I got off the bus, the sign "Parque Nacional / Villa Carimã" decided to randomly come off its chain and plummet straight down on my head like a guillotine. Its timing couldn't have been more precise; it missed my shoulders, arms and struck me dead center on top of my head.

At first I thought nothing of it -- I just held my head in pain and started laughing, which prompted Lara to start laughing, making everyone around us think we were on something -- but soon blood started dripping all over my face and down my neck and we realized it wasn't a simple cartoon injury.

Luckily an English-speaking guy with "France" on his nametag from the nearby information booth came to my aid. He led me to the men's room so I could wash up and analyze the situation.

"Are you a doctor?" Lara asked.

"No, but I have some first aid training," France answered as blood continued to rush down my face.

"You need to apply pressure on it to stop the bleeding," France said. "Do you have an extra t-shirt in your bag or something?"

I scrambled through it. "No."

France quickly asked Lara if she would take her sarong off so we could use that, but she refused. Later she told me that she was all up for helping me, but wasn't about to walk around the city in just her bikini bottoms.

Luckily I found my small towel in my bag and we used that amidst the chaos. Chaos is no fun unless its documented with cameras, so Lara had my little camera around her neck to document the events -- while still laughing along with me the whole time.

France escorted us to the nearby police station -- we stopped briefly to take a photo of me and my assailant. The police didn't speak any English, but luckily France was around to translate.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah," I said, still smiling and giggling with Lara who was nursing me with water from the water cooler.

France had a squad car pick me up instead of an ambulance. Lara and I hopped in the back seat while an officer was up front.

"[He's a tourist,]" France told the cop in their native tongue. "[He doesn't speak Portuguese.]"

The door closed shut and we drove off to the public hospital.

I GAVE LARA MY PASSPORT, MEDICAL RECORDS AND INSURANCE CARD and she sorted me out with admissions while I rushed into the emergency room. A male nurse led me to the guerney while I laid and waited, staring up at the ceiling, wondering what would happen next as a pool of blood started to collect underneath my head. Unfortunately there were no hot Brazilian female nurses to tend to me -- they were all male -- but luckily the lovely and headstrong Nurse Croft came to my side despite administration telling her it wasn't allowed. She knew me well enough that I would have been pissed if no one was around with a camera to document the whole thing. (You can thank her for these photos.)

An E.R. surgeon came into the room with a handful of supplies to prepare for surgery.

"Wow, look at the size of that needle!" Lara said to me and I lay in my own blood. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'll shut up now... Oh what's that? It looks like chocolate sauce."

"Chocolate sauce?"

The "chocolate sauce" was actually an anethetic and before I knew it was coming, the doctor was injecting it into my head around my wound. It numbed the pain pretty fast because I didn't feel anything as he sewed me up with about five or six stitches (picture above). Another doctor came in to check up on things, talking to the other in the foreign Portuguese that I nor Lara could comprehend. Staring up at the ceiling, I told Lara, "Wow, its like The Twilight Zone in here."

In a short while I was all stitched up and ready to leave, despite the cartoon-like lump on my head that was starting to swell down. The city had paid for my medical expenses, probably since I was from the U.S.A., the country of suers. I wouldn't have sued anyway -- it would have been too much of a hassle and besides, I got my exciting Blog entry out of it.

NURSE CROFT TOOK ME OUT FOR ICE CREAM at a nearby parlor before we went wandering the city of Foz do Iguaçu. There wasn't much to do on a Sunday so we had a quick cocktail and walked back to the terminal. The "Parque Nacional" sign hadn't been hung up yet -- it was probably down at the station for questioning like in a television police drama.

LARA AND I CHILLED OUT at the poolside bar for dinner and spiked milkshakes that night. We wondered how bad things could have been if I wasn't wearing my baseball cap, which cushioned some of the blow from the edge of the metal sign -- and now had a bad ass blood stain on it for my memento.

"I would have had to post a message on your website to your mom to call me," Lara said.

Sure, an episode of involving my parents in a hospital would most likely be more entertaining that this one, but that's something the producers of "The Trinidad Show" would probably save for Sweeps Week.

If you enjoy this daily travel blog, please post a comment! Give me suggestions, send me on missions, let me know how things are going back home in the USA. Knowing that I have an audience will only force me to make this blog more entertaining as the days go by. Don´t forget to bookmark it and let a friend know!

Posted by Erik on February 9, 2004 06:32 PM
TrackBack | Category: Brazil

ALL: Hey, now THERE'S a story for ya! Hope it keeps you busy as I may be NIZ for a while... my hostel is in an NCHUZ -- I actually took a bus into the city to upload the latest -- so bear with me!

Coming soon: Attacked by a quati -- an animal related to the racoon -- like Wil Ferrell in "Elf"!

Posted by: Erik on February 9, 2004 04:40 PM

Ok, now I can sing a song for you, courtesy of the reggae stylings of Dennis Brown...

Night nurse
Only you alone can quench this here thirst
My night nurse
Oh the pain... is getting worse

Back to my regularly scheduled comments... amazing you had to get stitches when the cap was not harmed, other than the blood. Also amazing that you smiled and laughed through it all... probably cracking jokes like Indiana Jones when he's in a pinch.

You da man! Dunno if you watch... but with 2 episodes left, sex could be moving to a foreign city, sigh.

Posted by: Duaine on February 9, 2004 04:52 PM

dude that looked like it hurt! .. Hope your alright .. You didn't suffer any memory losses did you? ... Or better yet try your Porteguese, you may be fluent now ..

Posted by: sim on February 9, 2004 04:54 PM

Damn NIZs.... and oops its Gregory Isaacs not Dennis Brown, that's what I get for not fact checking before hitting post. I'll bet you got all the rapid posters fooled by not logging into IM, teehee.

Posted by: Duaine on February 9, 2004 04:57 PM

Lady Croft: Excellent close-up shot of Erik's bloodgoo hair! Really gross!

Erik: There used to be Extreme Dishwashing, now Extreme Getting off the Bus, whats going on with you? (great story)

Posted by: Dtella on February 9, 2004 05:05 PM

Ouch! I hit my head on a metal clothing rack when I was a kid and I don't think it ever healed. I can feel the pain just reading your story, Erik. Glad you're none the worse for wear and that you had Nurse Croft to take care of you! Hehe!

Posted by: Tony on February 9, 2004 05:09 PM

wow. after all the incredibly dangerous things you done so far, the only thing to take you down was a sign. weird how somethings just happen. did you at least get to keep the sign? =)

Posted by: alice on February 9, 2004 05:11 PM

Dear God, you will give me a heart attack at a very tender age. The head has more capillaries (small blood vessels) than the rest of the body that's why the bleeding was pretty much. You had tetanus shot before you left, right?
You be careful, please no more episode of this kind.
God bless..

Posted by: Love, Mom on February 9, 2004 05:57 PM

Erik that bloody pic was grewsome!

To bad you didn't still have your hobbit hair. I would have further cushioned the blow .

Note to self: Wear a helmut when in Brazilian bus stations.

Posted by: Td0t on February 9, 2004 06:23 PM

damn eric! where was I when you needed someone to put stitches in your head? I got back to california few nights ago after 3 weeks in patagonia- already ready for another trip- maybe catch you in another continent!

Posted by: navid on February 9, 2004 06:52 PM

DUAINE: i second that sigh.. but as we all know, sex that good can't last forever.. i'll be mourning for a while.. til i complete my sex & the city dvd collection that is =)

Posted by: cristina on February 9, 2004 10:21 PM

HOLY SMOKES!!! what happen!@(*&! i'v been MIA from the blog for a few weeks (sorry) & return to a picture w/sharp objects by your head & blood dripping out .. YIKES!!!!!!!!!! is everything okay? i haven't read the story yet. i don't wanna jump ahead.... that pic looks painfull! OUCH!!!!! hope you are alright.

i am off to NORWAY soon. but, i printed out all the entries i missed (there's alot!!!!) & will read them on the plane! :) yahoo.

i see you're in brazil now. if you're staying at casa 6 (are you?) tell stephan i say hi. did you see the mural above his door? we became friends w/the guy who painted it. martin bundy!

anyway, more comments when i return & am all caught up...

(i'm jealous)

Posted by: elaine on February 9, 2004 11:04 PM

Ouch!! That's a scarey one! I'd be freaking out if I was travelling around and I started bleeding like that. Keep up the great spirits and attitude. Glad that nurse croft was with you!!

Posted by: melisa on February 10, 2004 01:27 PM

Posted by: melisa on February 10, 2004 01:31 PM

did they shave the hair around the cut? if not... then won't your scalp just grow over the hair...forming a weird shaped hair mound?

that would be kinda nasty.

Posted by: hanalei on February 10, 2004 02:12 PM

damn u evil sign de parque nacional vila carima!!!

u bungee jump, scuba dive, etc..not a scratch. but washing dishes and walking under signs sends u to the er twice. the irony makes good writing

Posted by: wheat on February 10, 2004 09:11 PM

It actually *is* sweeps time right now for the networks here in the US. We all know you had this story arc planned out since last fall. How else could you have scheduled in Lara in another guest starring role? She's very in demand...

I can't wait for the season finale! Make sure it's a cliffhanger that keeps us guessing until October so I can check all the nerdy TV sites for spoilers.

Oh, and because no one has said it yet:

"That's using your head!"

Posted by: Tony Alexander on February 11, 2004 01:26 AM

Erik, mate...that looks nasty! Cant believe Lara wasnt willing to walk around Foz half naked for you...Im surprised and shocked by her ¨un-cricket¨ like behaviour. (can tell she¨s not English!) Im not so healthy myself at present...holed up in the hostel in La Paz with a fever while Zoe does the Coroico downhill...not fair! Anyway, glad to hear youve come thru the wars, take care xxx

Posted by: sam on February 11, 2004 01:30 PM

I stopped reading for a few weeks and look at what happens. Those pics were pretty horrific, geez. That picture of you laughing reminds me of that polaroid in Memento. You're mom must've passed out! Be careful man, that wouldnt be a cool way to go.

Posted by: Dan on February 11, 2004 08:05 PM

Damn Erik, This was your big chance!!! You could have told us some big heroic story about how you were trying to save Laura from an animal attack or something, and the best you could do was a sign falling on your head. Right, you actually think we believe that, whatever!!! Just exactly what were you and Laura doing???

LOL, just kidding with you, Glad your O.K. really should watch out for those falling signs!!!

Bren

Posted by: Brenda on February 11, 2004 10:02 PM

Hey Erik,

I too have not stopped in for a few weeks. Wow! Sorry to hear about the injury. (I would have gave you my sarong!) I'm glad Lara was there for you, it's always better to share your pain with someone else.

Scars make great conversation starters!

Loved the story but you know .......we're entertained enough by just your travel adventures, no need to throw in accident, injury, blood, police, stitches, etc.

Please take care.

Posted by: socalgirl on February 17, 2004 07:38 PM

glad that everything worked out in the end... what was it that your parents said when the glass broke in your hand??? it was something funny, no?

i'm going to continue reading N :)

Posted by: nikkiJ on February 20, 2004 06:21 PM

February 09, 2004