November 25, 2005

"Brave", I have heard this one word hundreds of times. It has been bestowed by strangers, it has been bestowed by friends, it has been bestowed by other travelers, it has been bestowed by many.

The text inwhich this word has been presented in is "You are brave". Although they are looking at me, talking to and with me, I wonder, is this statement for me.

I have researched the definition of this word and it is as follows:

*possessing or displaying courage; able to face and deal with danger or fear without flinching; "Familiarity with danger makes a brave man braver but less daring"- Herman Melville; "a frank courageous heart...triumphed over pain"- William Wordsworth; "set a courageous example by leading them safely into and out of enemy-held territory"
* a North American Indian warrior
* audacious: invulnerable to fear or intimidation; "audacious explorers"; "fearless reporters and photographers"; "intrepid pioneers"
* brightly colored and showy; "girls decked out in brave new dresses"; "brave banners flying"; "`braw' is a Scottish word"; "a dress a bit too gay for her years"; "birds with gay plumage"
* people who are brave; "the home of the free and the brave"
* weather: face or endure with courage; "She braved the elements"

At first glance of the definition, I again say, were they speaking of me? "Displaying courage", I do not display courage, I am just on an extended holiday. What is so courageous in this action, I ask?

"Able to face and deal with danger or fear without flinching", Me? Heaven's no, I run from fear and danger, even the thought of it.

A "North American Indian Warrior", Me? I couldn't take a hook out when fishing much less fight with a spear to harm. A warrior I am not.

"Audacious: invulnerable to fear or intimidation", Me? I can hold my own but I am very vulnerable to fear, the sound of my pumping heart from a nightmare can be heard for miles.

"Brightly colored and showy", Me? Okay there I am with my shades of pink and blues...I am brave. But is this what they all meant?

"Brave", Me?? Definately not and I will continue to contradict the adjective presented to describe my journey, for I am not brave. I have fear, intimidation and I am not courageous...I'm just a dreamer who made the dream come true.