So I decided to extend my trip by two weeks. It is not because I feel a particular need to stay here. As long as I am here, I will be sure to have a good time, but the reason I decided to extend was more because I realized that if I went home, I would just be taking up space in my friends' homes and doing nothing but starting to stress out before I leave to go back east for 3 weeks.

Originally, I had planned to start the research of my new career, but I have realized that I would prefer to keep my momentum of traveling through my trip back east and then hunker down when I get back and can settle in a bit more.

Before I made my choice to extend, I was sort of freaking out too. I would've had two weeks and couldn't really figure out what to do with them. I also couldn't really figure out what to do if I did extend.

I was very indecisive. I wasn't sleeping well and I still am not. Life after my trip has started to sneak its way into my thoughts. As much as I would like to put it off, my unemployed, homeless, clueless reality is setting in.

When I only had two weeks left, I was really not feeling ready to come home. I thought about all of the things I would miss.

Moto rides, socializing with people from other countries, cool casual evening attire, dancing bare foot or in sandals, having my whole wardrobe fit into a small section of a bag, not having to do my own cooking or laundry, lack of junk food temptation, little kids on adult bikes, sapharon (sp) monks robes, happy waves and screams of hello, tropical landscapes, thatch stilt homes, street vendor food, tuk tuks, plastic chairs in bus aisles, people walking around in PJs all day, conical hats, not having to hear GWB's voice on a regular basis, not knowing the day of the week, constant stimulation, not needing to be fresh for Monday, constantly meeting new people, cold and amazingly refreshing showers . . .

I could go on.

Strangely, I do not really miss SF. When I finished my trip to S America, I could not wait to go home. Same with my time in Europe. I think a lot of that is because I am a more experienced traveler and I am more experienced in life.

In so many ways, this trip has been the opportunity to apply "if I knew then what I know now." Being here has been so much like being in college. It is super social, intellectually stimulating, everyone has their love of travel in common, everyone lives near each other, and even better then college- everyone is friendly.

Having been out of college for 10 years, I know exactly what I am missing. To some extent I got to travel back in time a bit on this trip and have the fun I never really had because I was too serious. Unlike when I graduated from college and thought the world was my oyster, I now know what real life is like and I cherish the opportunity to escape to a care-free life of socializing that is void of concern for career paths, cost of living, house buying and upward mobility.

I know exactly what I am going back to and I know what I will be missing.

Now that I have been in Thailand for a while, I am starting to look foward to home because I am not doing as much and Thailand does not excite me that much. Hopefully, the rain will let up so that I can do full days of volunteering and feel like I am accomplishing something. Koh Phi Phi is not exactly the best place to hang around in the rain.

There are also too many Americans here. I'm proud that Americans are here helping out, but I like being one of few Americans and frankly, Americans, myself included, are not nearly as good socializers as most other nationalities. In addition, the presence of so many Americans is confirmation that I am no longer doing something very adventurous and intrepid.

Well, now I am just rambling. I have thought about this a lot and have written it very eloquently in my head but now that I am in front of the computer, it is just not coming out that well.

Perhaps I will edit later if I have additional thoughts.