It's over. I can not believe it. I can honestly say that even before I entered political chinese territory, i had some real qualms about this place. I had no idea what to expect from a communist country where the language is tougher than.

The days seemed long, then short, then unbearably long, then instananeous. You meet people who help you categorize your days into a multi-level playground of all sorts, and other times your so alone you wonder what you have gotten yourself into. But here I am, only 2 weeks away from leaving this country...and to tell you the truth, I am a bit saddened...but don't feel sorry for me. There were times when I felt so over with China. You go through days where you think "please get me out of here now". After how many consecutive days of feeling that are you justified in acting upon it? Well for someone like me who is too stubborn to give up, it is never enough. Even only a week ago, i went through that. A real feeling of restlessness and just the desire to leave this place. But today, and especially yestereday, I have had a reall good outlook.

The actual word China translates into "middle country"; and it is quite appropriate. This country offers so many extremities to it. If you ever wanted to see what both sides of the tracks looked like, here's the place. And for that, I love it. The time I spent in small villages I loved. The time in cities, depending on which ones, I liked, or liked less; but never hated. China is a beautiful country filled with an immense amount of culture and natural beauty that would blow your mind, but with the goods comes the bads eh? There are the things you see, that when you lay your weary head down to sleep (whether it's on a lumpy mattress, a sleeping bag on the grass, the backseat on the dirtiest bus on earth, or someone's floor), you wish to god you could erase them out of your memory. After time enters the relationship, you soon realize you are glad you had to witness what you did, as the person it has changed you to become, is one who hopefully understands a bit more about the world outside their own.

I have suprised myself at how much I have done while here. I will always cherish the many days that have been spent laughing away, but will also cherish the days that have been spent in frustration. You grow a new skin of nails everytime your back is up against the wall in a place like this. You can learn the language to get around, but to master something like Mandarin to have conversational interactions with locals is a bit harder. But out of this came a sudden revelation; it's not necessary. As a test, even if I could say what I needed to, I would hold entire convesations with people without uttering a single sound. I would use strictly hand motions of acting out ideas, and it's amazing to see how it works. It really makes you think about language barriers on a whole new level. Then there are times when you are doing the simpliest of actions and the person is looking at you as if even such actions of walking are foreign. Those are the moments you want to hit people and scream and kick and think everyone in the world is an idiot.

Especially that moment of boredom when I decided I would go get a haircut. Try to understand the excitement/nervousness i felt, and the intensity of that boredom that actually got me to allow someone with whom I could not communicate a single word, to cut my hair. He cut half my head, and begin to style that half before he even started the second half...uh..that's not the way things are done..no matter what country you are from. They washed our hair, and put us in the seats closest to the doors and windows as if to display us. "Come get your hair cut here, westerners do, so you should too!" I had to point out several times which scissors to use, and once or twice had to take them myself and work on it. It was quite a fantastic feat, but well worth it, and overall fun. Besides, it killed 2 hours of my time, and provided lots of laughter... especially the pictures we took afterwards with the hairdresser.

You don't know China until you've rented a bike and ridden it during all hours of the day....and you DEFINATELY don't know China until the bike you were riding around all day is stolen. There have been endless nights of gallavanting around cities, dancing until the wee hours of dawn, nights spent under the stars, days of freezing cold rain, endless seas of robed monks, dinner sessions at 5 am in the middle of the streets, white capped mountains, vast deserts, rolling green lush hills, sweaty mosquito filled nights, countless conversations about scaffolding, and so many other random things that dreams and reality are made of. Including the manhood test, in which you are told you have complete a 4 series act, which would put you at the equal ranks of chinese men. 1) split a huge spitter 2) pee in a public area 3) shoot a snot rocket 4) burp

let the bells ring, I am more of a man than most of you are (SIMON).

What else ruled? a two part massage after a 3 day horse trek. The first part involving two major essentials: me laughing my ass off becuase I kept feeling like i was going to be tickled and me being bent in ways I didn't think was humanly possible. Then the second part was a cupping massage, which involves them lighting glass bowls on fire, and placing them on your back. The vaccum created by the temperature difference causes the glass to suck up your skin and take out all toxins. After having countless hot cups sucking my life through my back for ten minutes, they were removed and I was the proud owner of 12 new 3-inch diameter circular hickeys. I looked diseased but felt "clensed"? maybe?

Awesome part II: My last day, I randomly decided to partake in a Tai Chi lesson taught by some tai chi masters. What an amazing experience, to sit there nestled amongst trees, feeling this wierd anxiety about leaving this country, to be able to learn one of their most peaceful attributes, and do so before I was to board a 10 hour sleeper bus to hong kong. (Sleeper buses are these buses that actually have beds in them, but unfortunatley are all made to fit chinese people. aka...they are all built for people about 5' 3'' and under, but I digress)

I will miss China. Will I ever come back? One month ago I would have said never. As of today, I would say it's very possible. There is a lot of country here to see, and I would like to see the rest of what I missed. It's an uphill battle as you are struggling to become accustomed to the cultural shift that China is, but once you get to the top, it's a view you don't want to bat an eyelash for fear of missing something amazing...and after everything i've experienced here in China, can be a vast number of things.

This post doesn't do justice in reguards to the way I feel at the moment. I'm extremely happy for knowing I did this. I feel like I'm leaving here with this tiny little secret tucked away. It's about courage and dissapointment, beauty and destruction, love and sadness, and above all, the knowledge that there's a universal level all people wish to exist on..and reguardless of how and when we get there, it seems no on ever really stops trying. That is what this trip is about after all isn't it?

For those of you who I met along the way while here, I want to say a really heartfelt extreme thank you. You have all made being in a country like this, sane-able. Kate, Brian, Aaron, Red, Todd, Cecile, Steve, Yan, even you Finny McFinnigan, Tom, Al, Jessee the New Zealand body guard man, Simon (not really haha)...and the rest of you tards, especially Monkey Jane crew. Clarke, keep on with that guitar face, and you'll have ALL the girls...Chris, get that damn tattoo..and Abi..stop getting tattoos! Nick, keep that junk alive, becuase one day we'll tear it up all over again.

And a special thanks to that monsterous death trap machine bug that was in my room my last two nights in china. You scared the hell out of me, with your wierd spider type legs, and huge crab like claws...what are you?!

See you in Europe. mission 2/3 complete.