Lacking time and postage to send out wee little Valentine’s cards, I’ll make this a giant one. Truthfully, Valentine’s Day isn’t something I give too much thought or energy to. I’m a much bigger fan of the little spontaneous, creative shows of love that shrug at calendars. But, after an extremely rare weekend “out on the town” with opportunities to observe the mating rituals of Kiwis, I felt inspired today to think more about LUHV. [I can’t say "love" without hearing my sister mimic the Southern belles who pronounce it with 3 syllables.]
Both nights this weekend I watched bold women pinch asses on the dance floor (tourism should pay me for that comment too), smelled the clouds of perfume and cologne, and listened to my companions reminisce about love no longer and the search for love that lingers. I did realize though that as a 35 year old who’s currently in relationship resuscitation, what’s in my head is only written in pencil, waiting with an eraser for more experience. So, as I sat groggy and immobile today, I had fun browsing through quotes from those who apparently had enough experience or confidence to write in ink. Some made me think of my parents. Others of friends. Relationship mistakes. Relationship highlights. The W questions of life. A few are down below.
So, kisses blown and virtual chocolate shared, happy Valentine’s Day today but may love be a permanent pest.
We are not automatic lovers of self, others, world, or God. Love does not just happen. We are not love machines, puppets on the strings of a deity called “love.” Love is a choice — not simply, or necessarily, a rational choice, but rather a willingness to be present to others without pretense or guile. Love is a conversion to humanity — a willingness to participate with others in the healing of a broken world and broken lives. Love is the choice to experience life as a member of the human family, a partner in the dance of life, rather than as an alien in the world or as a deity above the world, aloof and apart from human flesh.
Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace and gratitude.
The opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference.
The opposite of art is not ugliness, it’s indifference.
The opposite of faith is not heresy, it’s indifference.
And the opposite of life is not death, it’s indifference.
HH THE DALAI LAMA
When we feel love and kindness towards others, it not only makes others feel loved and cared for, but it helps us also to develop inner happiness and peace. And there are ways in which we can consciously work to develop feelings of love and kindness…. What is important is that we each make a sincere effort to take our responsibility for each other and for the natural environment we live in seriously.
To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Therefore to love is to suffer, not to love is to suffer. To suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love. To be happy then is to suffer. But suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore, to be unhappy one must love, or love to suffer, or suffer from too much happiness. I hope you’re getting this down.
Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.
WILLIAM SLOANE COFFIN, JR.
Love measures our stature: the more we love, the bigger we are. There is no smaller package in all the world than that of a man all wrapped up in himself.
Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.