Yesterday I fell down the stairs. I dont think I’ve ever fallen down the stairs before. Ive fallen up the stairs in the past, but in my experience that doesn’t involve so much pain. Probably because when youre falling up the stairs you can look down in that eternal second before you land, see whats coming towards you and avoid the pointy things. Not to mention use those two useful things called arms to grab onto things like banisters (thats what theyre there for)and re-route your journey before its ends in full-face plant. This time, falling down the stairs, I was blind. I knew I was in the air, I knew Id have to land eventually. But not having eyes in the back of my head or go-go-gadget arms I couldn’t avoid the pointy things.
Falling down the stairs isnt something that happens to people like me and you, is it? Fit young, hand-eye co-ordinated individuals like us. Maybe it was that extra year I gained a few weeks ago. Falling down the stairs is what happens in the movies. In old movies people fall down black and white stairs and land in a crumpled heap and everyone assumes they are dead because of their excellent acting. In newer movies people fall down the stairs and are then rushed to hospital in an erractic, hectic ambulance film sequence, or if it’s very serious, like say everyone is depending on that person to make dinner that night, in a slow mo montage to sad, sad music. In thrillers, people dont fall down the stairs, they ‘fall’ down the stairs….