Find the Monk
The street looked like most of the others I’d been lost in all week. This time I was watching for signs of the World Federation of Buddhism. After recieving some unusually excellent directions at a dry cleaner’s I found the building and bumped into other raggity westerners. We were all here for the monthly English lecture on meditation.
Today the speaker was a wry English monk who’d lost his notes on karma. Instead, he decided to speak about “foreright efforts” in meditation. That is, how best to stay awake during meditation when your mind is clear of thoughts.
Being one, the monk had an interesting perspective on Westerners. He spoke in circles so I have to resort to listing his points. I find Buddhism didactic in the explainations of concepts that people should experience to actually learn.
Some of his lecture was exciting because it offered a twist on ideas we’d discussed at the Quaker retreat almost a month ago.
MONK: Meditate to get to know yourself. Often Westerners turn to religion when they are unhappy but why not meditate from a happy place?
The more distracted you are, the happier you think you are, the more you forget about yourself and become restless in time.
Putting aside our thinking leads to Wisdom – when the mind is somewhat silent it is easy to access the truth of the underlying emotions that drive us. Westerners overvalue thinking which leads to intellegence but not wisdom.
Mindfullness is bringing yourself back from the extreme (do/have) to the being of yourself. WHO is the wanter/liker/thinker (not just what do I want/think/like). Do I know my own mind?
The tongue is a hatchet in your mouth. You can hurt yourself and others most through unskillful words – whether said outloud or repeated in your head.
Next, he gave four ways to know yourself by listening to yourself (this is similar to Quaker ideas, but precursed the Quaker movement by thousands of years). He suggested meditation as the way to listen to yourself.
1) Abandon unskillful emotions that are already present. Name your own evil inclinations and you will discover that they hold no more power over you. Name the neurosis of competitive, jealous, paranoid, and they lose their power.
2) Restrain unskillful emotions that are trying to be present by avoiding them. For example if you feel like TV, bad company, bad places, discomposure lead to unskillful emotions leave them out of your life.
3) Maintain wholesome states that have arrisen. Know when you’re happy and say it. (If you can’t figure out when you’re happy go to authentichappiness.com and they’ll help you out).
In getting to know yourself and see your own bad motivations don’t miss how good you already are. Direct loving kindness at yourself first, then the world. Buddhists are proud of their accomplishments and remember them.
4) Arrouse wholesome/good states of mind that have not yet arrisen – don’t force this, just develop it. He suggested meditation for this but I can see it coming from many angles that allow for peace and reflection: writing, rowing, silence, music, healthy friendships.
The monk stressed that Buddhists don’t identify what is good and bad (eg. sins) because people can know this for themselves if they drop rationalizations and just feel.
Those were the points from the lecture that I found interesting. Afterwards I sat in a park and spoke with a Thai woman who attended the talk. She had been married to a Farang (westerner) but it didn’t work out and now she is the nanny for a French family. We watched the runners in the park until it was time for me to find my way home. I love the journey home for it’s simplicity.
Tags: ประเทดไทย, USA
Greta
Wow, thanks for the lovely thoughts from the monk! He brings to mind Regula’s admonition to be happy and “Surround yourself with beauty.”
It sounds like an emphasis on individual experience. Interesting to think of it and the corporate (group) experience religions at the same time. The affective theorists in my field (Hughes, Fosha, Johnson) have evolved effective theories of working with children in families and adults in families and adults alone, but not children alone. Kids need the grown-up present for safety, reference and connection.
Well, you set me reflecting as usual — thanks! Have a fine time —
Love,
Dad
Hey Greta!
Well, your blog continues to me a great procrastination tool for me….i can pretend i am exploring the world with you instead of spending my days at this desk, trying to learn all about the brain! Your pictures are amazing and I can’t wait to see all of them when you get back! But thanks for the updates and inspiring words from the monk! Things here are good…skel is DONE and not a good influence on me now. The elliptical is in the house and working! Lissie moves in a week from today, so we’ll let you know how she is. We think of you everyday and miss you!!!
jamie
Jamie! Where did we fit the steel-buns machine? I don’t think we should stop there! I’m thinking sauna, three blind masseurs, and a pool or river… island! monkeys!!!
Hang in there! You inspire me too.
love,
Greta