BootsnAll Travel Network



Enter the Big Boss

A long day of transport via motorcycle from Murud to Alibaug, a short hike to the bus station, bus to the jetty, catamaran to the Gateway of India, taxi to Chhatrapati Shivaji Terminus, local train to Chembur and finally an auto-rickshaw to Ratnadeep’s home is only continued a few hours later with a car–ride to Madh Island and the beach cottage where we would celebrate the changing of the year. The day is mostly uneventful, yet unfortunately uncomfortable due to the return of my old arch-rival, the stomach bug which has plagued me since Nepal. It is on this fateful day that I come face to face with the Big Boss, king of all toilets!

All my training could never have prepared me for this. His legions of vile servants provided no insight into the encounter I would have this day. Rather than an epic battle combating days of foul stench and dodging caked excrement, it plays out more like the ending of Kill Bill II; He calmly invites me into his home and compliments me on the success I’ve had advancing to his doorstep… the beautiful and pristine beach of Kashid:

As I squat in a hidden alcove of rock, my view keeps me bewildered by the immaculate light sand, cobalt water and great moon slowly falling towards the horizon. I can’t help but think that this is truly the king of all toilets; efficient and magnificent. Basic, yet perfect in it’s elegant simplicity.

Then, to prove that he’s still the boss, he performs a slight coup de grace and gently taints my left show with a small splash of deathly mud. But afterwards he graciously allows me to walk into the waves and clean my foul wound. Oh great lord of defecation… I am humbled and salute you greatness!

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