It seems every day I have doubts about this trip. Typically it is related to the the breadth of what I want to do during the three months I am gone and consequently the amount of gear that I am taking. Every day I contemplate just ditching all the ski gear and taking a more flexible apporach to the journey. By trying to make this the ultimate escape I may be making myself a prisoner of my own load.

Just today as I tried to do a final packing test I realized I still had too much stuff. I don't want a fourth bag, it's just too much hassle, not to mention the airline surcharges. I crashed onto my makeshift bed and pondered: what if I changed the goal of the whole trip right now? I could probably see so much more of NZ if I focused more on tramping and general sight-seeing. There is also the issue of what I do with my ski equipment when it is time to go to Thailand. The original idea was to ship all my winter gear from NZ to LA via boat. How much could that possibly cost? Try 200 $US for just the ski box. Double that if I add a box with my boots and other winter apparel. Imagine how silly it would be to lug my ski boots up and down every staircase and through every bus station in Thailand. Yet that is what I am faced with if I don't pay the bucks to ship that gear.

I was depressed this evening. Could I radically change the direction of this trip less than 24 hours before leaving? I got pizza and beer and watched an episode of "The Family Guy" on my laptop DVD. I needed a pick-me-up. Then my parents called and helped me think it through. The fact is that there is no wrong answer. I will have a good time no matter what. And in light of that why not travel less loaded. In fact, why not go there with nothing? I don't mean naked, or with no pack, but with no preparation whatsoever?

I am grinning right now: could this be the ultimate in vagabonding? By spending all my preparation time focusing on skiing destinations I have essentially no clue what else there is to New Zealand. Yet, ready or not, the journey begins in a few short hours.